harta2474's Journey with Lung Cancer

It all started with a back injury. My grandmother hurt her back over a year ago lifting something. She was going to physical therapy and the woman pushed her leg back too fast and too hard and my grandmother let out a piercing scream of pain. After that, everything got worse. She wanted to recover on her own with just time and patience but that's not the way it happened. Her pain got worse and finally she decided to get cortisol injections in her back and was trying different medications for pain. This is a woman that doesn't even like to take Tylenol. We were hopeful that now that her pain wore down her stubbornness she was going to recover...

I got a phone call on Friday morning, May 10th. It was almost 11 a.m. and my aunt asked me where I was because my grandmother had a stroke and was being taken to the hospital in an ambulance. We were all really concerned about how she was going to be able to do physical therapy with her back injury. She can't move her left arm, and I feel like she's not "all there" at times, which is probably for the best because she went from being in perfect health, a independent active caring person so invalid, trapped in her bedroom. She would cry saying this isn't a life, i am just existing. So I can't imagine how she feels now, so I think it might be waser for her to not realize completely how bad things are. It hurts me more not to be able to have the old her, but it's not about my pain, it's about lessening her pain.

My grandmother beat breast cancer many years ago, so imagine our surprise when we found out she now had Lung Cancer that spread to her bones. The recovery was daunting before, now we didn't even know what to think. I asked my grandfather if she was going to get better and he gave me a sad look and told me it was bad, really bad. I can't just give up that easily. I am ready to try anything that might help as long as it doesnt cause her too much pain. My biggest fear is she will go through all these treatments and they wont work and they will kill her faster. I want her to be comfortable and enjoy whatever time she has left on this earth. Of I could have one thing it would be for her speech to come back to i can talk to her. I can't imagine having to say goodbye and she can't communicate with me like she used to.

After almost a month she is finally home. We are learning what needs to be done, and its like having a big baby. Good thing I work at a retail store dedicated to baby items! So I know a little bit...