pegasus222's Journey with Breast Cancer

I received the diagnoses over the phone. Basically, it was 'You have breast cancer' and that was it. Throughout all the testing (ultrasound, biopsy, etc.) everyone kept telling me that there was very little chance that this was breast cancer. The tests were just to make sure it wasn't. So it was a total shock when I got the call that I had breast cancer. Since I have known two women who have died from breast cancer, I thought my life was over.

I actually had two surgeries. The first one was to remove the cancer and the lymph nodes. Then the surgen wasn't comfortable with the margins of the cancer removal so two weeks later I had a second surgery. I experienced very little pain with both surgeries.

There was some discomfort with the radiation. Mostly like a severe sunburn. The lotions suggested by the radiation onocologist were very helpful in keeping this under control. Also, the technicians were great people - friendly and positive. They helped a great deal to keep my spirits up during the procedures.

There has to be a reason why I got this disease and I don't know what it is. I have never smoked, used alcohol or drugs and the disease does not run in my family. I am slightly overweight but have been keeping active and had lost 25 pounds. Before my diagnosis I had a great physical checkup, so for this to happen was a total shock. How can I trust that this will not happen again. My cancer was removed but how do I know it won't come back? As for people, throughout the entire diagnosis process I was mislead about my chances of having cancer. Then throughout the entire treatment I was pretty much ignored by my family, friends and co-workers. In fact, I had to go on short term disability because I wasn't 100% and my boss stated that if I could not be 100% then I should not be a work. So it is hard to put your trust in people when you seem to mean so little to them. I guess a little kindness and consideratin was too much to expect from people. My sole support was a great husband who went to all my treatments with me and did his best to maintain a positive attitude with me.

My stress release was riding horses. With the surgery, radation treatments, medical bills and loss of income I had to give up my horse. For some of us, horses can be our best friends and provide great exercise and a great way to release stress. It is hard to be unhappy, stressed or upset when riding. A great ride can do more to lift our spirts than winning a million dollars. As of this point I have lost that. I am trying to get back into the sport, but won't be able to fully participate until I am fully back to work and have finished paying my medical bills.