Depression/Anxiety - Blaze

Side Effects Associated with Adenocarcinoma, Cervical Cancer. Posted on July 16, 2016 View this journey (15 Experiences)

It looks like you can only pick one side effect out of the drop down menu so I chose the one I struggle with the most. I have weight loss, hair loss, bowel pain and leakage, urinary incontinence, very bad chemo brain and no short term memory, I struggle with social situations, pain in my tail bone possibly from the radiation, financial issues from having to leave work, sleeping issues, and I'm dealing with all this not just during treatment but now that treatment is over but I haven't had my scan to see if the cancer is gone which heightens the anxiety. I was alone for most of the time during treatment and I'm finding out it has changed me in some fundamental way. Always a social butterfly now I can't handle social situations without feeling like I'm an outsider even with friends who have been very supportive. This is more information than I have shared with anyone just to give you an idea of the social and emotional isolation I have been in for the past 8 months.

1 Comment
  • lawcreate's Avatar

    Blaze - Hi and welcome to the group. You are not alone in so many of these things! I am a Stage 4 cerv cancer survivor with my 3 years out check up in Aug. I can relate to so very many of the things you write about. I, too, lost a lot of weight - it took me about 2 years to gain it back (thanks to my screwed up thyroid!) . Your hair WILL grow back in it's own time. I wore a bandana (because my head was always cold - lol). I completely get what you are saying about the bowl pain. I remember the first months I pooped after my treatment, I thought I was going to eject off the toilet seat it hurt so much. It, too, takes time to heal. Urinary incontinence is typical. I swear I reverted back to toddlerhood - there were issues with pooping and peeing. If I felt the urge for either, you better not be in my way ..... Panty liners were a big help. The urinary tampons were not available after my treatment, you may want to try them. Keegel exercises help some.
    Chemo brain is REAL. I couldn't keep a string of thoughts together to save my life. Everything had to be written down on a list. I worked with a very good neutropath and did supplements, as well as a very clean diet for a while. It took me about 3-4 months, but it can get better.
    As far as social stuff, you aren't an outsider. I found it has much more to do with them and not about YOU. They don't know what to say/do and they are fearful of saying or doing something inappropriate. It will resolve itself as time moves on.
    I see other What Nexters have helped you with the financial part. Pls talk to your oncologist about some counseling/psychotherapy - let him/her know you are struggling and about your anxiety. If they are a good center, they will have help for you or know of good resources.
    In short, you are not alone!! You are in the same exact spot many cancer patients are or have been - your life and body have been turned upside down and you are just now getting righted. Be kind to yourself - nurture your body through the healing process. Be patient - it takes time to recover. Be positive in how you view your new self - you are a warrior, a fighter, and part of an elite group of women. And maybe last of all, you are strong. Remember the Lord never gives us more than he knows we can handle. You WILL come through this a better, much wiser person than when you started. My blessings and thoughts are with you. You can only get better if you ask/or talk openly with others.

    over 3 years ago

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