loss of my independence, and my ability to act as if I have it all handled, I needed HELP - JoLoaretti

Loss Associated with Leukemia . Posted on September 13, 2012 View this journey (5 Experiences)

do not feel alone, reach out, and some one will catch you, this is a hard battle and You can do it alone but it will be an easier journey if you can share it.
My husband had NO INSURANCE, we live in California, he ended up on medical,... odd thing is he gets better care on medical that I do on Kaiser, he gets better care on Medical at City of Hope one of the best facilities, and while he is there he often gets better care than people with great insurance plans, cause their plans have to get approved & the state is GOING to keep my honey alive, so tho there will always be some challenges, with or with out insurance there are benefits to both having it it & not having it...always a ying and a yang, always a good side & a bad side....if you feel like your on the bad side just remember all things in life are a cycle & if your in the dark the light is on its way....

My husband has AML has had 2 bone marrow transplants & the one 160 days ago did not work, I could find all sorts of things to be sad about, I can find a ton to worry about, but it does not change a thing, what I do is start everyday with what I am grateful for, and that makes the hard parts feel a bit easier. just remembering lifes cycles, and that they always do cycle... good bad.happy sad. light dark.high low. ebb flow. youth. age. life death. sickness health, day night. you are not alone, there are so many of of wondering why me....
I try and look at the lessons Im learning through this and it is amazing the things, actually the gifts I have been given by having cancer in my life, I learned to live in the moment, I have learned there is no time for bull Sh*#... I learned to be grateful for what I do have & that is right NOW, Ive learned to say what I need to when I need to, I learn to let those I love know it & one of the biggest is I have learned to let others HELP ME~!~ I have always loved to help others, but never let anyone help me... I knew how good it felt to help other people , but would never give anyone else that gift of feeling good by taking care of ME, how selfish I was & how great it does feel when some one who does care about me is allowed that privilege of feeling good for being able to care for a friend. that was a great lesson, and you know what you do not feel so alone when you finally admit you want and need help, it will be there~!~

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