• MerryMaid's Avatar

    MerryMaid asked a questionHead & Neck/Throat Cancer

    Is it normal to have your spouse blame you for everything that goes on or goes wrong around the house because of your cancer?

    6 answers
    • meyati's Avatar
      meyati

      No, my husband was abusive-controlling-called me an idiot and a bunch of curse words-told me that I was incapable, but he never blamed it on an illness. He blamed it on my voice, blamed me for being Irish, lots of things but he never blamed it on illness. he told me that he wished that I'd die, so he could do what he wanted, but he never blamed it on illness. .

      4 months ago
    • Dawsonsmom's Avatar
      Dawsonsmom

      MerryMaid, I am so sorry you are having this additional stress. While it is stressful for families, cancer patients need to manage stress to better cope w all that is going on with your disease and treatment. Counseling could help if your husband would go, but I’m betting he knows he should not be treating you this way so is likely to refuse. I’m not recommending that you do anything in particular but honestly I would probably tell him to shut up and walk away. That said, I’m a blunt Midwesterner and that bluntness can be offputting. Hoping for better days for you.

      4 months ago
    • SandiA's Avatar
      SandiA

      My husband and I went through something similar. When thinks were going bad he talked to me like he was mad at me. I finally said I don’t understand why you are mad. I didn’t ask for this but I am trying my best and you being mad at me doesn’t help. He looked stunned. He said I’m not mad at you I am mad at the situation and scared. It took some time but he tried to adjust his reaction to things. I wish you all the best and hope things get better.

      4 months ago
  • MerryMaid's Avatar

    MerryMaid asked a questionHead & Neck/Throat Cancer

    Recently I've either known of or been told about several people in my area that have died from cancer.

    10 answers
    • Bengal's Avatar
      Bengal

      OMG! RockTom, I thought I was the only person who did that. I look to see how many people have lived into their 90's (my mom is in her 90's and my grandmother lived into her 90's as well) then see if they have beat out those only making it to 50's or 60's and work out the statistical chances. I know it sounds morbid and completely weird. See, on WhatNext we're always finding out we're not alone no matter what. ;)

      5 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      It depends on the circumstances for me. I will say that it freaked me out a bit when the girl I went to Israel with died just a few months later ... and within weeks after I quit treatments for the first time in 6.5 years. For a while, it seemed like someone I knew and loved was dying from lung cancer every day or two ... or, if not dying, were learning their cancer had begun to grow again ... and most of them are or were long-time survivors.

      5 months ago
    • carm's Avatar
      carm

      I dont know where you are in relation to Toms River in NJ. Were you a resident there, I would be wary as that trial was used on many back room deals. All these years later and we do not know the the extent of damage that has caused from that training experience. Its a shame that the exposure negated all of it and b the lesser. Stay well

      5 months ago
  • MerryMaid's Avatar

    MerryMaid asked a questionHead & Neck/Throat Cancer

    Have any of you used CBD oil to pain? Does it work?

    5 answers
    • Bengal's Avatar
      Bengal

      I've tried CBS oil for osteoarthritis pain and anxiety. I couldn't see that it did much of anything. I know other people who swear by it.

      5 months ago
    • Skyemberr's Avatar
      Skyemberr

      CBD oil can be used for light pain and relaxation. It is very good for people with epilepsy in controlling some kind of seizures.

      My palliative care doctors had me read a long book about all of the various forms of marijuana and what they do. It is called Stoned. It was a good and informative book! You can find it on Amazon if you are curious. I like it because it was written by a doctor trying to help his patients it and he does a lot of research.

      I am not taking anything now, but if I had to choose something for pain and to eat I would probably use an edible that has precise dosing info on it. It's possible to get a few different strengths and flavors that are packages precisely, plus has the added benefit of not giving my kids the wrong idea about medication. The only reason I'm not taking it right now is because I have a brain met and I'm afraid I might accidentally mask a symptom my doctor needs to know about now.

      5 months ago
    • Danfan714's Avatar
      Danfan714

      Tried several different formulas designed specifically for my nerve pain and found no relief

      5 months ago
  • MerryMaid's Avatar

    MerryMaid asked a questionHead & Neck/Throat Cancer

    ringing and buzzing noise in your ears

    8 answers
    • meyati's Avatar
      meyati

      I think that I hear you. My hearing isn't that great-according to hearing tests-but hearing aids magnify the tinnitus. I tell my ENT- why spend thousands so the buzzing is louder.

      5 months ago
    • bsbard22's Avatar
      bsbard22

      My husband has loud ringing in his ears since finishing Cisplatin chemo treatments for his tongue cancer. His oncologist says hopefully it will lessen over time.

      5 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      I have had it for a long, long time. I can't remember if I had it before chemo or not, but definitely since. I generally tune it out but like now, because we are talking about it, I hear it loud and clear. I usually tell people it keeps me company because it is constant and loud. I am sure it makes my hearing worse - people have to compete with the ringing in my ears.

      You might be able to get some anti-anxiety meds. It won't help with the tinnitus, but it might help calm your nerves enough to deal with it and be able to sleep.

      5 months ago