• A little over two years from winding down treatments and still

    Asked by HardyGirl on Tuesday, December 3, 2019

    A little over two years from winding down treatments and still

    fatigue, scars, irritable bowel, self doubt, body disfigured, sometimes I wonder if it's worth all the pain and suffering.

    6 Answers from the Community

    6 answers
    • Bengal's Avatar
      Bengal

      I hear you HardyGirl. This is all the stuff they DON'T tell you in the beginning. I have days when I wonder if being "cured" of the cancer but left with all the other stuff was worth it. We see pictures of the glowing woman in a sports bra who's just run a 5K, saying " my cancer was the best thing that ever happened to me". Bulls___! I have one doctor who is fond of telling me to quit bellyaching and just be grateful I'm alive. If course, I am. However, being alive (heart, brain, respiration working) and living a life are two very different things. But....I AM grateful that my cancer was caught early, I survived the treatment and I am moving forward. Sometimes it's a struggle. Sometimes I'm discouraged. Sometimes I wonder if it was all worth it. I just do as best I can. Hang in there.

      3 months ago
    • Created07's Avatar
      Created07

      I think I take a little bit different thought on this. I have scars on my stomach from endometrial cancer (along with radiation tattoos)..Scars on my breast from 2 surgeries (along with radiation tattoos)...a scar on my back from malignant melanoma and was without hair from chemo for non-hodgkins lymphoma. I Do see them as battle scars. I don't think I will Ever trust my body again. But the One who created it has shown me again and again how precious I am to Him. So I lay back in His hands and trust him with my next breath because cancer is not the only killer out there. Now this part may have to do with your age, but when my husband sees my scars he says they are proof of how close he came to losing me and how very precious I am to him.

      3 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      I am with @Created07. I was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer in November 2012. I was in treatment until April 2019. Now I am in "watch and see," which is nice since now I only have to go every 3 months instead of every 2 weeks or once a month. It's like a reunion now when i go in.

      I am huge now; couldn't lose a lb for anything (i was always thin before). I hate the weight but I am alive. But, i am far more than alive, i am living. I don't have the energy I did, but again, I am aliVe, living. And i enjoy life, nearly every single day.

      I have a joy deep inside of me that no cancer will ever steal. It comes from my faith.

      And, @Created07 is soooooo right. Last year, my 43-year-old unexpectedly dropped dead from a heart attack. No time to say goodbye or I love you one last time. A few months later, the same thing happened to my best friend since grade school. There are worse things than cancer, imo.

      3 months ago
    • JaneA's Avatar
      JaneA

      We all must find peace after diagnosis and treatment. I have a permanent colostomy after Stage IV rectal cancer. While it's not perfect situation, I'm know that I am in a better situation than many rectal cancer patients who don't have to have colostomies but end up with the "frequency and urgency."

      I am that "glass half-full" person. I am grateful to be alive five years after diagnosis.

      So what I'm saying is that you have to dig deep and discover the sheer joy of seeing the beauty in life. I've taken up watercolors, and the act of painting lifts my heart. Best wishes.

      3 months ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN

      I have always said that as long as I have the strength left in me and I can see a viable future, then I am all in. But when I see that the writing is on the wall and I'm not going to gain anything by keeping on, then I'm done. I hope I never see that happen.

      3 months ago
    • Lynne-I-Am's Avatar
      Lynne-I-Am

      Sounds like you need a support group of other women who are going through or have gone through what you are experiencing. Talk to your doctor or health care facility . All of us experience setbacks related to health issues , job issues, emotional issues and so on. Some get right back up and move forward, others need an additional boost. The first boost has to come from you. Support groups have certainly helped me. Facing cancer at 66 was no picnic and the chemo sucked. Talk about scars, I have had four abdominal operations, so scars aplenty. Body image? I have sagging skin, wrinkles up the whazoo and gray hair . Getting old is not for the weak . I realize how very lucky I am to be again enjoying life at 73. Yes, the pain , the setbacks, the loss of hair and fatigue fighting the cancer was all worth it. Get the help and support you need. Reach out, ,get up and get out. Find an activity you like .Look forward and not backward . Wishing you better days ahead and you once again find life worth living.

      3 months ago

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