• Anyone had a tough time getting into the holiday spirit?

    Asked by mamajltc on Sunday, December 25, 2011

    Anyone had a tough time getting into the holiday spirit?

    It was 2 years Oct. that my husband got diagnosed with colon cancer. Now into his 3rd chemo (and told he will be having it for the rest of his life), several operations, many complications...He has a great spirit and although he is in stage 4 (spread to his lungs), he is doing well. Amazing attitude and does what he can. But I am so sad that he is tired so often, cannot do the same things he could do a short time ago, remembers very little ("chemo brain"). I work 45 + hours a week and we have 2 teens. They are pretty independent but he still needs to do things for them when I am not here. I just couldn't do a tree, or find a way to get into the spirit this year. I tried. I counted my blessings and tried to see friends and did everything I could to snap out of it. I have not had this feeling very much and yet, this year, the holidays made me more sad than happy. Anyone else? thanks so much..all of you, for being so incredible.

    7 Answers from the Community

    7 answers
    • GregP_WN's Avatar

      I haven't had trouble this year, but 2 years ago when I was diagnosed for my 3rd time it was in Oct. my first dr.s visit for that was in Dec. I was in a deep state of being mad, the why me syndrome, while sitting in a mall waiting for my wife to come out of some stores I was looking at everyone walking around all happy and just got mad. It was tough. That went away as I got into treatment and got out of treatment and started into recovery. this year is kind of normal I guess. I know the feeling you have, I hope it gets better for you, and good luck in your husbands treatments, may they be easy and quick.

      almost 5 years ago
    • danellsar's Avatar

      Was feeling super low and no holiday spirit until just a few days ago. Then I realized that he's here NOW, we need to celebrate and enjoy NOW and appreciate what we have. It's tough to be grateful when you feel so much loss and stress, but it's all we've got.

      almost 5 years ago
    • susie81610's Avatar

      Can we take the tree down now? I did it only because I still have 2 kids they are 16&20 but I went through the motions. My problem is I'm lonely my family has went their ways my sister came over and as always something happens and her and my hubby get mad at each other and she takes off. Which it did she stayed for about an hr and half then stormed out. Its very lonely hubby made a big turkey dinner with all the fixens was wonderful and no one to share with even though I feel blah from chemo on wed I still would like to see people. Oh well its done its over and I guess time to move on to the new year so grab my rear end with my hands and get moving again. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

      almost 5 years ago
    • mamajltc's Avatar

      As the day ended yesterday, and I sat with my husband, quietly watching TV and eating our meal, I looked at him and cried. I said that all I want is for his illness to go away. I want him not to be so tired so often and not to feel lousy on a moments notices. I also told him that we chose life, when we decided that we were going to fight this tooth and nail. That the choice is fight or not fight and we will fight because it is worth it. His 68th birthday is New Years Day. My 52nd Birthday is a month later. It turned out to be a day of reflection and in the end, my sadness turned to strength. Sometimes it works that way. We did not exchange gifts, per se. But we did give another 'gift' and a New Years resolution..a promise. That this year, we would spend more time doing fun things and spending time with people we love. When we can. We ended our evening on a giant hug and kiss and words that have carried us through..I Love You
      Sending our love to all of you! And withing you a New Year...with better health and continued hope and fight..to find a cure!

      almost 5 years ago
    • CarolLHRN's Avatar

      I am glad all turned out well for you. Sometimes just be honest with how you feel and sitting with it a while helps the feelings pass in their own time.

      My birthday is coming up in another week or so and I'm not much looking forward to celebrating as i never thought my 38th brithday I would have an ileostomy and about to start a round of chemo. But there are also times when I reflect that I want to remember my 37th year as the year with the awesome summer vacation in the outer banks and my 38th year with some other awesome adventure. I am trying hard not to focus this time of my life as a cancer patient but focus on all the things I can still do.

      Hang in there. This journey is certainly a roller coaster; days when you are on top of the world and days you just can't seem to find the strength to get out of bed.

      almost 5 years ago
    • mamajltc's Avatar

      You are all so wonderful. Thank you answering and sharing. I wish you all the best New Year, filled with Health, and Hope

      almost 5 years ago
    • Annebehymer's Avatar

      It was very hard for me June of this year was when I found out I had overian cancer stage 4. I was doing fine when December started I have been in remission for around three months and out side of the side effects I was glad to be alive. I went in on the 22nd for my maintiance chemo and found out that my numbers had jumped 16 points. Now I have to have more blood work on the 10th of January and then on the 12th find out if I am going to need another cat scan because the cancer may be back. That kinda my christmas seem like XXX. I am trying to push it back and enjoy the holidays but just can't. So yes I know how you feel. I will pray for your and mine joy to return.

      almost 5 years ago

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