• Caregiver Best Practices: Your Thoughts?

    Asked by Rick1970 on Saturday, March 15, 2014

    Caregiver Best Practices: Your Thoughts?

    After 6 months of trying to "be there" during my spouse's Pancreatic cancer (Stage IV) journey, I'm realizing that not even 43 years of marriage have prepared me to be an effective caregiver. Your thoughts and/or any references for caregiver training and/or tips will be greatly appreciated.

    5 Answers from the Community

    5 answers
    • Vivien's Avatar
      Vivien

      Rick,
      As a caregiver myself for my husband of 40 yrs, I have learned in a very short time since diagnosis TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF! You may want to do everything as I do, it is a huge task. Ask friends, family for their help when they offer. Seek outside help that most insurance covers; Light housekeeping, Physical therapy, bath services. I was amazed at what is out there. Above all set sometime aside just for you. This is not being selfish but you need to rejuvenate. Next be patient when your loved one is cranky, childish or down right crabby. They too are carrying a huge burden. Take notes and ask questions of the doctors, nurses or whoever. Find someone to talk to when you feel overwhelmed. I am here and would like to share what I haved learned, and am still learning.

      My Best Wishes,
      Vivien

      almost 6 years ago
    • dojka69's Avatar
      dojka69

      I agree completely that taking care of yourself while caring for others is vital! I was the caregiver to both my mother & grandmother. Sometimes it seems like the world is caving in on you, but sometimes you have to be selfish and grab some time for yourself, and that's OK! You will come back refreshed and will be less stressed (even for a little while).

      almost 6 years ago
    • SamTed's Avatar
      SamTed

      In this case, I am the patient, who has was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer 7 months ago. I am trying to use my remaining time well and appreciate my wife's help. We have been married over 46 years, yet she still is not prepared for this, nor can anyone be.

      I have no idea how soon it will end, but I want to make all as good as it can be in the meantime. I do not need undivided attention, and I still want to be in charge of my own life.

      To me, the most important thing is honesty. Long talks, memories of pleasures and grief. In one way, I feel blessed by having a "2 minute warning" before my life is over.

      almost 6 years ago
    • MMarie's Avatar
      MMarie

      I took care of both of my parents. When I look back now, with much more clarity and knowledge, I wonder how I did it. After my mother's death, I worked as the regional director for our local chapter of the Alzheimer's Association. I was fortunate enough to be trained as a Master Trainer in a program called "Powerful Tools for Caregivers". While taking the class is optimal since it gets you out and allows you to meet others experiencing similar situations, purchasing the book is an option. It might be worth contacting the company itself to see if anyone is trained in your area. Be well.

      http://www.powerfultoolsforcaregivers.org/

      almost 6 years ago
    • Rick1970's Avatar
      Rick1970

      Thanks everyone! I really appreciate your comments! While they're consistent with what my wife's oncologist has recommended, it's great to hear the thoughts based on personal experienced. Prior to my wife's PC diagnosis, we were very active walkers, hikers and bikers. So, spending time away from her to exercise ... i.e., stay fit, is the most difficult thing for me.

      over 5 years ago

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