• Decision Point (Numerous questions in my head!)

    Asked by i_am_scared on Thursday, November 1, 2012

    Decision Point (Numerous questions in my head!)

    As of today - should I break the news to my dad (patient) and my mother just now?
    Dad - He's just out of surgery and recovering. May not want to hear this news.
    Mum - A very emotional person. May not be able to digest this news.

    2. Should I break the news - Who should do it? Me? A close relative like my uncle? or the Doctors themselves?

    3. Should we go ahead with Chemo + radiation as per doctor's suggestion? - Heard that it sorta sucks out all the life/light out of the person. Might stay alive, but like a vegetable. (I could be wrong on this. Rather I hope.)

    4. Any alternative therapies?

    Just so you know - I am his 24 year old son. Just started my career. Feel really scared. But trying to put up a really brave act - atleast in front of my mum and dad. Telling them that its gonna be alright. I have an elder sister who lives/works overseas. She did visit my dad post surgery for 5 days and she's equally scared/worried and feeling helpless since she lives away!

    39 Answers from the Community

    39 answers
    • Schlegel's Avatar

      I misunderstood the question. I thought you were the patient, but my answer is basically the same. You cannot keep this from your dad. He will know something is wrong. By not telling him, all you will do is shut down communication. If you do tell, you will find that in the next few years you will have some of the most memorable conversations with your dad.

      over 8 years ago
    • nancyjac's Avatar

      "Please suggest me if there are any alternative therapies worth considering if any."

      If you are asking if there are alternative to chemo and radiation that have the same purpose and intended result, the answer is no. If your dad decides not to have chemo and/radiation and just have palliative treatment, there are many that his doctor can discuss with him.

      over 8 years ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar

      To I am scared:
      I'm shocked that your father's doctors told you before telling him. If your dad knew he had surgery for a brain tumor, he is likely prepared to get news about cancer. I'm older than your parents, and I would be furious if I was the patient in this situation. They will handle it because they have to. They are old enough to know that sickness is part of life.

      over 7 years ago

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