• Do you find yourself fighting not to become a bit of a hermit?

    Asked by LiveWithCancer on Wednesday, September 12, 2018

    Do you find yourself fighting not to become a bit of a hermit?

    The longer I am retired, the harder it becomes to make myself want to do things outside of the house. I have so much I enjoy doing here that there are never enough hours in the day ... but I don't think it is healthy to not get out and about. So, I schedule things to do so that I am obligated to go outside of these 4 walls. Am I the only one who gets too comfortable at home? (It probably doesn't help that my husband, once a social butterfly, has become a virtual hermit.)

    19 Answers from the Community

    19 answers
    • po18guy's Avatar
      po18guy

      Being the CEO of a major anti-social media site, whose web address I cannot divulge, I find the detachment and aloofness comforting. I am beginning to know how Nero felt.

      A suppressed immune system leading to common colds that last three months may have factored in there somewhere. ;-)

      2 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      I have to MAKE myself go to different events ... i am way too content to stay at home!!! And, i don't hahave a compromised immune system.

      2 months ago
    • po18guy's Avatar
      po18guy

      "Solitude is painful when one is young, but delightful when one is more mature."

      - Albert Einstein

      2 months ago
    • Molly72's Avatar
      Molly72

      So, what's wrong with hermits?
      The more I see of humans, the more I like animals!!!!

      2 months ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN

      I was asked to sit in with a friend's band last weekend. We were talking about the good ole' days when you could go play music at any dive bar in the world and there would be a crowd. I was saying that people like me and Donna are partly to blame because if we don't have to get out, we will stay at home on a Fri / Sat. night and are perfectly happy to do so. Donna gets in a groove every now and then to get us out to go see people or places. We say that we only live once and we need to go do some things. But you know, come Friday night, my but is dragging! I'm tired and happy to stay home.

      2 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      @Molly72 ... haha, now I definitely agree. I do love my animals :) :)

      @po18guy ... Einstein spoke the truth, for sure!!!

      @GregP_WN, at least you go to work every day!! You have a good excuse for wanting to stay in and rest up from the week.

      2 months ago
    • alivenwell's Avatar
      alivenwell

      I created a bucket list. I need to get out of the house and shop, work or visit places I longed to do in the past but just didn’t take time to do them.

      2 months ago
    • merpreb's Avatar
      merpreb

      When my depression and anxiety bloomed into PTSD I became a hermit. It was lonely and scary and even more depressing as I have always been a social person. I am now out and about but still walking the rim of PTSD. It's an on going battle, but I'm winning. Staying home was a must- I felt safer.

      2 months ago
    • JaneA's Avatar
      JaneA

      Between my husband's bad knees and my cancer surveillance, we get out lots. We always combine those medical trips with a lunch date - I also go to a cancer wellness program twice a week. So I do get out - as long as you are not depressed, it's probably not a problem.

      2 months ago
    • Dianem's Avatar
      Dianem

      I am continually amazed at the things we all share. My daughter often tells me I am becoming a recluse. I’ve tried to analyze it and I definitely am more content to stay home. I think it’s for a number of reasons. First after all those years of running around it’s nice to be retired and enjoy the luxury of not HAVING to do something. Next it’s because being home allows me to pursue solitary activities I enjoy like reading. And then there is the idea that I have come to have a deep appreciation of little things,the pleasantness of the day, the beauty of nature. Taking time to slow down and smell the roses as they say. Overall, being a hermit is not a bad thing. Keep strong and God bless

      2 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      Awwwww, @Dianem, my soul sister!!!! You described it in such positive terms ... and I kept thinking, "yeah!!!"

      I LOVE not HAVING to do something. It makes my heart happy to see my calendar with nothing on it for a day. (Which is NOT the case today - I have to go for blood draw, doctor visit, and infusion... better get off of here and get with it!!!)

      2 months ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      LWC Don't your agility meets keep you quite busy. My faith keeps me out of the house several times a week. And since classes at the Y are much cheaper than physical therapy I go to the Y twice a week.

      2 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      @BoiseB, agility DID keep me very busy, but i haven't been able to play since radiation. My stamina took a nose dive. I am hoping to get back to it soon. (I have to save my money though until after i go to Israel in January. That trip is killing my budget!!)

      2 months ago
    • biga17133's Avatar
      biga17133

      Yes some days are harder then others and seems to be really hard lately I was laying in bed other day thinking how sick I was feeling and moaning and groaning and then it hit me 1 yr ago come the 15th of sept will be one year ago I found out I was stage IV they gave me 3 months with treatments maybe 6 months well ha ha its coming up to a year and it made me think" "get out of this bed now MR. right now ! You could be in the ground but your not" so get up get dress and handle this MR." and I pushed myself and got up im not running around the block but im up ,,im in pain but im up I feel like crap but im up im here not there and im up falling into being a hermit becomes easy getting up hard and I know there will come a day when I cant get up but" TODAY IS NOT THAT DAY",, I'm going to continue to get up until God says "NO come home CT scan on the 18th to see were im at but who care because I know I"M UP !!!! still taking a bath by myself biga17133

      2 months ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      One thing that keeps me out of the house is my house is pretty Spartan I don't have a lot of decorations or pictures.
      @Big A are you in the path of the hurricane or did it pass you by

      2 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      @biga17133, you have a beautiful attitude, my friend. Sadly, you were diagnosed on my birthday :( CONGRATULATIONS on your one year anniversary!!!!!!!! You go!!!!!!

      2 months ago
    • wmsavs' Avatar
      wmsavs

      LWC, you are constantly traveling, going to everything cancer. Try to enjoy the downtime and try to be productive at home if you must do something. I would say if you're lounging the day away in the bed, then consider setting up a routine to get your day moving a little- daily hygiene activities. I also thought you would meet friends frequently around your area. Try to re-connect with them once a week to catch up on things. In order to save money towards that costly trip consider each person bringing a covered dish rather than meeting at a restaurant.

      2 months ago
    • biga17133's Avatar
      biga17133

      @BoiseB luckily it turning south when it hits so we just going to get 50-60 mph winds and 16-20 inches of rain, unless it changes again,,,lol well stock up on supplies either way. And happy birthday to you @LiveWithCancer what's this make number 22,,,lol still taking a bath by myself biga17133

      2 months ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      @wmsavs, you're right that I'm not really a hermit :) :) I usually stay really busy at home ... that's the problem - I have so much I want/need to do at home that I don't want to get out and about. The car sits in the driveway for a week without moving sometimes.

      I'll be more likely to get out (maybe) when it starts getting cooler. I detest Texas summers.

      @biga17133, thanks for the birthday wishes. This is the biggie - 65! I console myself with "I never thought I would see it when I was diagnosed ..."

      2 months ago

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