Great saying is IT IS WHAT IT IS....lol
We just have to deal with it.
All Humans are terminal and we just got a wake up call about it.
Most people keep it out of their minds..
Barry

I know this question has been here for a bit, but I just found it and boy, did I need to hear this stuff today. I am a 34 yr old mother of 4, my youngest is 4 and has cerebral palsy. doing chemo again for recurrence of pancreatic cancer after being in remission for only 6 months. I have been finding it tougher lately to keep the positive outlook I managed to keep last time. My chemo regimen changed a few weeks ago and I am having a tougher time handling the side effects. The enormous amount of guilt I have for not being able to be the mother and wife I should be able to be is pressing on me. I know that the "down" days will go away at some point and am trying to add some natural antidepressant (e xcercise!) Back into my days, but for the first time I am getting paperwork done, like advance directives and other wishes for end stage care done, something I never considered my first time around. Im not giving up, but considering the possible realities that come with this diagnosis and recurrence is draining my hope for even a new "normal" life. That said, it really helps to know that I am not alone in feeling bad, emotionally and even though I cried reading some of your guys responses, it was only because you put into words what I have a hard time saying. Hearing other survivor stories definitely makes me feel better and helps me to rally and "get on with getting on." Thank you all for your time and energy to be on this site. Every survivor (and I include family of cancer survivors in that description) are so inspirational and just reading your battles, victories, and yes, even the losses, reiterates how much we need to be able to connect with others and have someone we can "borrow" strength from on those days where we are having a hard time finding it with in ourselves. For that I say "thank you!" to all of you.

Wow survivors of 13 years?! I never thought that possible! I've been having a down week this last week up to today. And reading your stories has made me feel much better about what I'm going through. During the down days I sometimes feel all this pain and suffering isn't worth it, but I continue on. I do have more good days than bad thank God. To answer your question, yes, I do feel disconnected a lot of times. I really wish I had found this site in the beginning! You are all amazing!