• Does anyone feel annoyed?

    Asked by Jalemans on Thursday, July 10, 2014

    Does anyone feel annoyed?

    Watch him while I have chemo...

    I wish people understood. I haven't worked for months, so something like a grocery gift card would be much more helpful than flowers. Someone giving me a break & taking Munchkin to the park for an hour would be heaven. Cancer is something I have, not who I am, & frankly I am not happy about it. I don't want cancer shirts or pins or a million books about cancer -- I don't want to think about it every second. Maybe if & when I feel like a survivor, I will sport a small token, but I don't want cancer to define me even if it kills me! Instead people, invite me out for coffee or lunch!

    I know I sound like the B of all time. But, really, does anyone share my feelings?

    19 Answers from the Community

    19 answers
    • MsMope's Avatar
      MsMope

      Wow! Are you lucky to have friends and relatives sending you flowers. I wish. Unfortunately, I outlived my parents and brother. The relatives who remain, except for my daughter, are all on Social Security. And they live far away.

      We moved to a small town when we retired. We're "city people" and while often "welcomed" we were never really "included." I put quotation marks around the words town people said to me. One flat out told me her mother always welcomed new people but never would include them.

      That made it easy for me to live under their gossip radar from diagnosis thru the last chemo treatment. I just stayed home all winter except to go to doctor's appointments in the nearest big city where I was very happy to be anonymous among those citizens.

      So - I did not get flowers except once from my husband's family in Ohio. I considered myself very, very lucky the day they arrived. They were beautiful - a pot of white mums and a poinsettia. They're both enjoying summer outdoors (in their pots).

      I made it thru nicely. I didn't allow people to define me as a cancer patient because (1) I didn't tell them and (2) there are few people left who love me enough to REALLY care.

      I made it thru nicely. But - it sure was lonely. Count your blessings.

      over 5 years ago
    • Ejourneys' Avatar
      Ejourneys

      I just read this, which relates and which I think is very well said:
      http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2014/07/learning-human-nature-cancer-diagnosis.html

      over 5 years ago
    • Jalemans' Avatar
      Jalemans

      Ejourneys, yes. Thank you. J

      over 5 years ago

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