• Emotions

    Asked by Kathy on Monday, May 6, 2013


    I'm a 2x survivor and 4 months out since my last chemo. I am on some medications and doing individual therapy. It has been difficult because things I thought were resolved are coming back to haunt me. As of real lately I can have these intense sudden outbursts over little things that just make me so mad. I do have a lot of good times of course but the road seems extreme and unpredictable. It can be hard to carry on with work and my social life in a manner of which there is nothing that has happened. Not really a question in here I guess. Looking for some empathy. I find I answer most the questions here that deal with emotions because at this point I feel they've been the most challenging for me. Thanks!!

    11 Answers from the Community

    11 answers
    • GregP_WN's Avatar

      Kathy, you are not alone in your feelings. We all handle them differently. The first two times I went through the diagnoses, treatment and recovery with hardly no emotions. I got done and went back to my life and didn't give cancer much of a second thought.

      This last time was totally different. I went through extreme emotions, anger that I had it for a third time, why me phase, fear phase since it was a third time, and a bit of worry along with it all.

      I find for me I get through it best if I concentrate of the positive things in my life. I can find something good in every situation I am confronted with, and I concentrate on that.

      Others will offer their help and advice too. I wish you peace and healing to finish your fight!

      over 3 years ago
    • CAS1's Avatar

      Of course and totally normal.

      I am starting the YMCA fitness program in June.. In part for my body and also for my mind. I also can endorse the Deepak and Oprah meditation series as helpful for the stress and anger.

      You really might need to be assessed for depression and PTSD.. Are you sleeping properly?

      Are you caring for yourself as well as you should? Do you need more joy? You know the answer the issue is getting it into your life.

      over 3 years ago
    • BuckeyeShelby's Avatar

      I agree with what's been said. When I was having some issues, my nurse case manager suggested I might have PTSD. I thought it kind of weird -- that's what happens to soldiers and police officers and people who've been in bombings and had trama... Well, we've had trama, too. Not just in the way most people normally think of it. The "violence" we've experienced was an attack from the inside not the outside. So we have all sorts of weird emotions and denials and things that seem to come out of left field. Trust me, most people here get it. And have gone through something similar -- some maybe not quite as extreme, others maybe even moreso. Hang in there. And if you need to speak to someone, go for it. An outside perspective might be helpful. Check w/your oncologist for a recommendation or referral.

      over 3 years ago
    • BobbyG's Avatar

      Hello Kathy, I am new around here. However, I am know stranger to despair. It is tough living the way we have to live. It seems so unfair to watch those fritter away their precious lives of impeccable health. To hear all the menial petty complaints borne of selfishness and self pity.
      I do not pity my self. Although, My heart breaks for my wife and children who may someday may be the only ones left to suffer the effects of my disease. I find it so hard to look into my wife's loving green eyes knowing the pain I may one day cause them.
      Angry? Sure I am. I am strong and willing to fight with any means available. I am in the middle of IL2 treatment for stage 4 Renal cancer. So why does it seem as if the cancer stands a chance against me?
      You are most definitely not alone with your emotional struggle.

      Empathy I have plenty of, and you can count on me to share all I have over this digital circuit. : )

      over 3 years ago
    • KateMarie's Avatar

      Kathy, I am so sorry you are having a tough time. It is definitely understandable after all you have been through. Others have given you some great advice. I don't have any of value to add, so I will just send hope for a better tomorrow and cyber hugs your way.

      over 3 years ago
    • Marti76's Avatar

      Kathy, I am new to this site. Just signed up today. I hear what you're saying. I'm not the one with cancer in my family, it's my Mom. She was just diagnosed this March. It's been really hard on us all, but I can see what it's doing to HER and I can only imagine what she is feeling. I don't know how I can help her except to be there for her and remind her that she is a strong woman and that after having 8 kids and raising everyone one of them to be strong, productive and God fearing adults...she can beat this cancer! And you will too! Be blessed and stay strong.

      over 3 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar

      @Marti76 and @BobbyG, to both of you, welcome to the site and thanks for helping out on the question. We all hold a valuable resource in our knowledge and experience through this terrible journey. Thoughts and help like this can only help make the journey just a touch easier.

      Thanks to everyone also, you are a fantastic bunch of warriors!

      over 3 years ago
    • Carol-Charlie's Avatar

      Hi emotions. Just wondering...since I'm a highly emotional person if your oncologist gave you any anti-depressants? I know mine said take them!... They really helped me. I just cruised along emotionally... Have you shared with your oncologist what's happening emotionally! ((((Hugs)))) always help. Even if they're cyber!

      over 3 years ago
    • Kathy's Avatar

      Thank you all of your for your responses. I am already taking an anti-depressant and also seeing a social worker one on one. I still feel overly emotional at times. Maybe the meds need tweaking but I was really hoping the talk therapy would help. And both have but I guess I want to be more stable. I know the bottom line is that I need to be patient and kind to myself and also accept these new limitations. I do feel extremely blessed to have so many resources available to me one of which is the whatnexters family.

      over 3 years ago
    • alivenwell's Avatar

      I sought exercise, weight lifting, running as ways to deal with excessive cortisol, adrenaline and stress. I'd walk into the gym all tense and leave feeling very relaxed.
      It helps to have a trainer or somebody familiar with equipment to get you through the workout. Keep a written record of your weight settings on equipment. It really helps. My other stress buster is my border collie. She's very sensitive when I'm not feeling well, but she's always willing to head outside for a good long walk. Best investmen ever!

      over 3 years ago
    • nmill11's Avatar


      Cancer - When I first heard those words in the E.R., I told the Doctors all I wanted was a Liposuction, Face Lift and Breast Augmentation, not Cancer. I was lighthearted about the diagnosis. I have Stage 3 Ovarian Cancer and will have my 4th round of Chemotherapy on Tuesday. I receive Chemo every 3 weeks.

      Before this, I had been diagnosed with PTSD and Depression, talk about a range
      of emotions. I try to hold everything in and remain calm when I'm out in public. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. I still have sudden outbursts, especially around coughers who doen't cover their mouths and especially smokers.

      I want the universe to act differently. I want them to see the world though our eyes. Life is not a forever thing. It is not to be taken for granted. I appreciate every day I can wake up and spend time with the world and my cat Kelso. I have days when all I want to do is coocoon and not pull up the shades and wear ears plugs to drown out any possible sound. I don't exercise as much as the Doctors have recommended over the years either.

      Sure I get angry, I get into the "Why Me?" syndrome. I hate the world and I hate me. I hate all the suggestions, i.e. what to do and when to do it. I get overwhelmed and shut down.

      In other words Kathy, you are entitled to have any and all the emotions you are having. I am sending you a special hug and will be here through your journey. Stay as strong as you can and know we are here to support you through this.

      over 3 years ago

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