• Friend with breast cancer recurrence recently admitted to hospice care. How to cope?

    Asked by attypatty on Tuesday, July 17, 2012

    Friend with breast cancer recurrence recently admitted to hospice care. How to cope?

    A dear friend had breast cancer (surgery and radiation) 10 years ago. She has had a recurrence and this time, it has metastasized to her brain and liver. She was admitted to hospice care last week and it's pretty clear she will lose her battle with cancer within a short time. I look at her and can't help but feel - this could be me in 10 years. We all thought she had it beaten - cancer free for 10 years, and then it returns with a vengeance. I need help coping - making this about her, not me, so I can be strong for her. But I can't help but think about myself - how can I make sure that I won't be like her and have this all come back in 10 years?

    3 Answers from the Community

    • FreeBird's Avatar
      FreeBird

      Life can be overwhelming when we drive with the high beams on too often. There are so many "what ifs" in every area of life. What if you're so worried about ten years from now that you get hit by a bus while crossing the street? It helps to turn on the low beams, and look forward to what you have today-- right now-- and work from there. Tomorrows problems will arrive eventually. We can only take it as it comes. Live for today.

      over 5 years ago
    • FreeBird's Avatar
      FreeBird

      There's also hope that ten years from now, there will be discoveries, treatments and cures that no one has even imagined yet. Think about all of the changes over the past 10-15 years to the computer that's sitting in front of you.

      over 5 years ago
    • Charlieb's Avatar
      Charlieb

      One of the things I have been told by my medical team is, especially with cancer, you have to take one day at a time. Spend and cherish each day you have with your friend. Talking about other things besides cancer will help you be strong for your friend and even help you out.

      over 5 years ago

    Help the community by answering this question:

    Create an account to post your answer Already have an account? Sign in!

    By using WhatNext, you agree to our User Agreement, and Privacy Policy


    Read and answer more invasive (infiltrating) ductal carcinoma questions.  Also, don't forget to check out our Invasive (Infiltrating) Ductal Carcinoma page.