• Has anyone ever welcomed you to the cancer club, or said something like, "welcome to the club", I had cancer too?

    Asked by HotRodTodd on Thursday, September 24, 2015

    Has anyone ever welcomed you to the cancer club, or said something like, "welcome to the club", I had cancer too?

    At first I was a little put off, but now that I thought about it I guess it's better than one of the alternatives and that would be being a member of the "dead club". I think it's all in the way you look at it.

    11 Answers from the Community

    11 answers
    • barryboomer's Avatar
      barryboomer

      I think it's nice. You can take it different ways like everything else in life.

      about 4 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN

      I've heard it, and I've said it, I don't mind it all, like you say, it depends on your perspective of it.

      about 4 years ago
    • jhale17's Avatar
      jhale17

      My thought is that when a survivor hears “welcome to the club” they are having good fortune. This person may not have any answers to my many questions but the fact of them acknowledging me as an equal and not some alien is helpful in itself.

      Cancer survivors learn their condition affects their relationship with family and friends. I had those who did not stand by and support me. But, on my first occurrence of cancer there was one small group at my workplace that on their own band together and looked out for my needs as much as they could and management gave me time off and rest periods at work when I needed them. This made me thankful as they eased my burden. I did have a loving wife as a caregiver, bless her heart, she was also a cancer survivor.

      Even the tiniest show of support as saying something like “welcome to the club” has a helpful and uplifting effect on me.

      about 4 years ago
    • Ejourneys' Avatar
      Ejourneys

      I've used the phrase, "Welcome to the club no one wants to join." I don't recall hearing "Welcome to the club," but I was welcomed with open arms to my local breast cancer support group. I've also met fellow cancer survivors in situations where we've "come out" to each other. I view it as a gesture of both fellowship and visibility, especially given how hush-hush cancer has been in the past (and to some extent still is).

      about 4 years ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      Yep, i have welcomed people to the club no one wants to join. There is usually an automatic kinship with others who also have cancer, i think. We "get it" like few others do.

      about 4 years ago
    • msesq's Avatar
      msesq

      I can't tell you how many times I have heard "welcome to the club no one wants to join". I don't take offense, and deem it a way for another survivor to introduce the fact that they had cancer and are there to demonstrate it's not a death sentence.

      about 4 years ago
    • Ross' Avatar
      Ross

      Good responses. Living with/after cancer kinda' feels like beating the devil. What Next has helped our PC community to be a source of support and helps strengthen our resolve.

      about 4 years ago
    • billaron's Avatar
      billaron

      I actually love to both hear and say it, although I use a different wording. We are a club; we are a club of survivors; we are a club of people who have learned to want to make our lives mean something. There are no age, race, religious or gender qualifications. From the instant we receive a diagnosis, we are survivors!

      about 4 years ago
    • reschnur's Avatar
      reschnur

      It's what my dad used to call a backhanded compliment. In this case not so much the compliment, but the backhanded part.

      I take it as an attempt to be sympathetic.

      about 4 years ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      Nobody says anything. but here we have what I call the Cancer Clique. It is just that at any gathering all of the cancer survivors seem to gravitate to each other. We all gather round and upstage each other. I have a non-cancer friend who always makes a point of introducing all her new acquaintances who have cancer to me.

      about 4 years ago
    • Rolltidelynne's Avatar
      Rolltidelynne

      My answer would completely mimic livewithcancer's comment. I've said the same phrase a couple of times. My experience w the two people I said it to were one of like a wink n a nod to each other:) they knew instantly that I understood and I would be there for them! I wouldn't be offended if someone said it to me :) That's one of the reasons I come here - we ALL understand n are there for each other:)) Not. Club I want a lot of people to join...but I love the members of my club here:)) YALL lift me up, help me, n laugh w me!!

      about 4 years ago

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