Hi and welcome to WhatNext, sorry it has to be under such circumstances. First thing is to not panic as even stage IV cancer is not a death scentance. Based on all of the information on your page Iassume that the places the cancer has spread to were identified by a CT or PET scan. A CT scan only sees differences in tissue density and a PET scan see metabolic activity so for now what you have are suspecious spots that look the same as cancer does. Only a biopsy can confirm if it is really cancer. Half the population have spots in the lugns and liver that look like cancer but most don't have cancer.
Even if it is all cancer there have been a lot of advances in research and treatments in the past few years. Ipersonally have had two surgical procedures and three drugs that were not available 8 1/2 years ago when I was first diagnosed. So, while you two have a fight on your hands it can be won.
Right now you and I assume he are scared which is understandable and normal. You need to turn the fear into a determination to fight and win. If someone cites survival statstics or survival time to you remember that they are only averages and are based on data that is at least five years old. I have personally hit the 5% side of the odds 5 times in a row so beating the odds can and does happen.
There are alot of people here that can and will answ\er any question yuo have and will offer up any help they can. Good luck and let us know how it goes.