• Jtj's Avatar

    How do I support my husband?

    Asked by Jtj on Wednesday, June 5, 2013

    How do I support my husband?

    He had surgery Nov 2011 then radiation. PSA has been undetectable until last week, it's point something. Based on what he told me, dr says there are lots of treatment options to try to suppress PSA. My husband won't talk about what he's feeling but I get the impression he's thinking the worse, again. I feel so bad because I just don't understand how he can think that way when he has so much to be thankful for. Is there a book or something I can read to help me "get it"? Any advice appreciated.

    6 Answers from the Community

    6 answers
    • Queen_Tatiana's Avatar

      I too am the caretaker of my husband for 9 years now, and I wish I had an easy answer for you. One thing I do is go to his Dr. appointments with him so I can too hear what the doctor says and ask my own questions. It helps a lot. This board is a god send to me and my husband, Feel free to email me any time with questions.

      over 3 years ago
    • YogaJean's Avatar

      Supporting a loved one is tough - tougher than being a patient. I've been both patient and caregiver. Get support through a local group and keep yourself going. It is a difficult subject for most men and the options are not easy ones. Imermanangels.org is a one-to-one support for patients and for caregivers - get yourself an angel!

      over 3 years ago
    • geekling's Avatar

      Look up hifu. I've a friend who went up to Canada go get it done prior to it being approved in US and he is absoflockinglutely fine and dandy.

      If you don't "get it" think about how you would feel if the seatr of your power, the very heart and soul of you were personally threatened. Bluntly, how would you function without use of your vagina?

      over 3 years ago
    • jdcarolina's Avatar

      My spouse went to a grief counselor about 4 times and he was able to tell her what he was not comfortable saying to me. It seems to help.

      over 3 years ago
    • mgm48's Avatar

      I'm the patient (castrate resistant...) and from my perspective there are a few things I've found that my wife has done that really helped. #1 being there and listening. Sometimes at the appointments so I don't miss what is being said but more often just listening to me (I know it's hard cause it can be horribly repetitive). #2 answering the repetitive questions so I don't have to. #3 being honest about how she feels and correcting me when I get off track. After nearly 44 years of marriage we have learned a whole new level of communication.

      Kep it positive and smile :)

      over 3 years ago
    • rosemr's Avatar

      Wish there were easy answers. I too am a caretaker for my husband who had prostrate surgery Nov 2011. He gets his PSA every three months and it is like XXX waiting for the answer. His cancer escaped the prostrate and got into 2 of 14 lympnodes. Anyway, for what it is worth, just be there for him, and Give it to God

      over 3 years ago

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