• Joy's Avatar

    How do people on this site cope with being post treatment and the fear of what comes next?

    Asked by Joy on Sunday, December 11, 2011

    How do people on this site cope with being post treatment and the fear of what comes next?

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    12 Answers from the Community

    12 answers
    • RhoMo's Avatar

      That is a really good question, I have been wondering that myself. I will be watching your post to see what kinda of answer you get.

      almost 5 years ago
    • mysecondchance's Avatar

      I heard about the "let-down" that may come after treatment so I saw a therapist a few times. I did experience a feeling of what now? I was use to doctors, family and friends being concerned about me and caring for me 24 hours a day and now that I was finished with treatment I felt on my own. I just started to concentrate on the fact that I was well now and didn't need that constant care. I loved being independent again. I hadn't even driven my car in eight months and now even driving down the road by myself made me feel normal again. I think I had an easy transition but that doesn't mean the thought of what could happen is not on my mind. Everyone is different but my suggestion would be to seek help if it all becomes too overwhelming.

      almost 5 years ago
    • nancyjac's Avatar

      What comes next is living. What comes last is dying. And that is true for all of us, whether we are cancer survivors or not.

      almost 5 years ago
    • markmather's Avatar

      Putting the past behind us is challenging and enlivening. You have every day to live the new life which has been given to you. You can do it without the fear. Be yourself .

      almost 5 years ago
    • justbreathe's Avatar

      Trying to pick yourself up after all the drama of cancer can be another type of challenge. I read some of the other comments and each one of them had good insight.
      I still have my moments and it has been two years. We never know what each day holds. When you are having a good day make the most of it.
      I am glad that I have today. Hoping the best to you in health and laughter.

      almost 5 years ago
    • mspinkladybug's Avatar

      Post treatment is just like baby blues you talk to people and it gets better as as for the what if we learn not to live in fear and have faith that the monster is gone but some days we do freal out and worry

      almost 5 years ago
    • po18guy's Avatar

      I may never be "post-treatment", yet I no longer live in fear of what comes next. One's world view can make all the difference. In my case, I had an awakening of faith not long before I received my diagnosis. I believe that this prepared me for what was to come. Since no one on earth knows the future, we must find our comfort elsewhere. I have learned through all of this to enjoy the blessing of each day as it arrives.

      Before I worry about tomorrow, I must first wake up tomorrow. And, even if tomorrow is a bad day, why worry, since it will be gone by tomorrow?

      almost 5 years ago
    • PetraW's Avatar

      I am at a very similar point in my journey and I just asked a similar question to the network a few days ago. I am adding the link here to the answers I received and there are so many helpful aspects in them: http://acs.whatnext.com/questions/time-after-cancer. Two things that really stood out for me were, that I feel I am stumbling through my days and just don't know, what the new direction is. One of the comments was that "stumbling" is perfectly o.k., it is my way of finding the new direction. Stumbling tells you, that you don't want to go back to what you have been doing in the past. It is the transitions that are always hard, and so far I have totally rejected the "stumbling". But after reading the writer's comment, I have started to embrace it. It is my way of finding my new path. Somehow it has given me confidence and trust that I will be able to find it.

      The other comment I totally love is this:

      "..As you move forward, simply be open to new opportunities, confident that they will come (because they will, sometimes most unexpectedly). Let go of all the other stuff from before that doesn't make sense now. It's like picking up shells on the beach - you pick them up one by one until suddenly your hands are full and you can hold any more. So what happens when you see the next one, more beautiful than the rest? You can only pick it up if you put down some of the shells you are holding now. So put down the old shells, make room for the more beautiful ones to come." I am absolutely determined to discover the new treasures.


      almost 5 years ago
    • Fusionera's Avatar

      Fear of what's next after cancer is perfectly normal. I have been through this now 4 times in just over 16 years with my brain tumor treatments. Permit yourself a little time to grieve, because cancer naturally changes one's life perspective. However, look to the future as though you are done with it forever, because even if it recurs you will have gained so much from whatever you decide to do. For me, that was getting my master's degree in business after the first two brain surgeries. It does not have to be something rigorous like graduate school, but set some goals as to what you want to accomplish, as they will lead you forward. What about a nice vacation? I wish I had done that back when I first finished grad school, and I am now doing it early next year. My bucket list trip at last! :-) And no bucket.

      almost 5 years ago
    • AngieJ's Avatar

      i am going through the stages of grief DABA , i go back & forth to anger & bargaining i learned i had a blockage July 15.2011 I believe each person is unique & will deal with the dx & testing in their own way , maybe someday i will do better with my emotions.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Joy's Avatar

      Thanks for all the heartfelt responses, I do appreciate each and every one of them.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Stevedarke's Avatar

      Hi Joy

      We go through so many emotions when faced with our own mortality but these emotions are shared by many of us. I agree with what others have said in that is we must put weight to the positive emotions such as hope. If we choose to live our lives in fear then we are mourning our away our future happiness, a happiness which is ours by right. I may die from this illness but I won’t let this illness take away my dreams for I believe without our hopes and dreams we are painting ourselves a very bleak future where all the colours find their way to darker shades of black from the tears that we cry.

      At least we have knowledge of the fate that may belie us, there have been many who say goodbye whilst parting and are never seen again; at least knowing the things we now know, we are able to speak the words that are unsaid, and right the things that are wrong. Below is something from my book-

      ~Wasted moments~
      I am neither a spring flower nor a mighty oak, I am just a man with frailty of life, it’s not the time I have but the journey that counts, regrets for the future of what might have been are what the reaper leaves behind as unfinished business, cast aside regrets and trivial things, say the things you have to say, share the things you have share and live your journey to the end.

      Keep up the good fight,


      almost 5 years ago

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