My surgeon told me when I first started my journey to just Ride the Wave. At that moment, I don't know what was harder: holding back tears or keeping from kicking my surgeon in the shins. This journey is a roller coaster but I just ride the wave instead of trying to fight it. It has been really hard for me lately because I have one more chemo treatment left next Wednesday but if my labs aren't good, I have to wait another week. The unknown I think is the worst roller coaster. I just want to be done but can't plan to really be done until my labs are drawn. I have been doing mediation to help get the bad thoughts out so that I can concentrate on being positive and riding the wave.
Liver Cancer Questions
How Do You Deal With The Emotional Roller Coaster?
Asked by steve70x7 on Monday, April 23, 2012
How Do You Deal With The Emotional Roller Coaster?
Good news, bad news and confusing news. One day to the next and even many times in a single day my emotions seem to swing up and down. Sometimes I just want to GET OFF THE ROLLER COASTER for a while!
I wrote in my blog about this Roller Coaster at http://faithfulinthemeantime.wordpress.com/2012/04/19/the-roller-coaster-of-living-with-cancer-2/
8 Answers from the Community
I think what's worked the best for me is just to live through the emotions - much like "Riding the Wave" as Carol mentioned. Allowing myself to be up, down, happy, sad and angry - stick up both middle fingers and give cancer the ol' double bird, all the while thanking God for the good things that come from having cancer - and there are many - well some anyway.
Living with cancer is a very weird way to live and it took me a good year to make friends with it. But it's an uneasy friendship at best and ultimately, I wish it would just go the XXX away.
Anyway, I wish you, and all of us, a semblence of peace.
As hard as it may be right now, just know that one day, it will be over with and you will start on your last part of this journey in getting well, and recovering. I have been where your at 3 times, I know exactly what your talking about. I got so mad this last time I was mad at the world, everyone around me that was all happy and smiling and enjoying life, it made me sick. Then came the treatments, the sore's, raw throat, couldn't eat, sleep or sit without hurting. I thought I would never get out of that spot, but now, that seems an eternity away. I have prolonged side effects that will never go away, but still, I'm out of that spot and getting closer to feeling as normal as I ever will. Keep your head up, try to keep a positive attitude through it all, I used to tell myself to just don't think about the negative stuff, keep your mind off what you don't want, and ON what you DO want. It helps, simple as it may seem.
Best of luck to you!
Much like Carol said, this journey is a roller coaster ride, without brakes. Atleast mine had been. Your options are to fight or go with the flow. Going with the flow and giving in when needed is much how i have survived the past 6 months.
I have days when little things can make me cry. Might be that I have a better appreciation of things, or I'm XXX that I have to go through all this XXX. I don't try to figure it out, I know it will pass. When I am tired, I nap. When I'm hungry, I eat what ever is there, and when the loving caregivers are hovering, I ask them to leave.
Hey Steve . It seems everyone has covered the bases pretty well.
Another thing I do is forget I have cancer ..just stop thinking about it all together .. its not easy cause people are always asking ..."how do you feel" I answer or I ignore...and fill my head with cooking or my new smart phone ...what ever you like to day dream about.. ...I just think it away ...it will be what it will be ...G-d willing..we will all emerge from this journey ...Hopefully to live another day ...
G-d Bless Us all on this journey .... Peace ...
Years ago while taking my grandkids to therapy (being raised by me) I learned about "identifying your feelings." Example: I am not mad. Could be overwhelmed, disillusion, etc. Finding the right word helps to identify and store away. Point is...I like the term of "roller coaster ride." Smile. I have used the term, "knowing you are going to be dipped in ice water, again."
As a caregiver...I am unsure and afraid of offending or saying the wrong thing. When I read about all your inner feelings...it does help me. My husband will "sugar coat" and hide his real feelings. The only time I get the real version is when I over hear a conversation he is having with someone else. Thank you for all your insight. I may not jump on board but I do read the post everyday. Smile. God be all of us! Amen.
I remember greeting my original diagnosis in 1995 with either sheer faith or a healthy dose of denial. The first thought that came to me was: "My father buried his first wife. I will be damned if he is going to bury his only daughter." Fight or flight mode kicked in immediately. I cried a lot that night. I've had moments like ttisme had, where the slightest things send me over the edge, and other times I face whatever challenge is presented to me with a really twisted sense of humor. It has varied over the years. I just continue to fight and ride the rollercoaster until the Almighty Father decides it is time for me to get off.