• How have you dealt with the death of a family member who had the same cancer as you?

    Asked by StegalMan on Thursday, February 28, 2013

    How have you dealt with the death of a family member who had the same cancer as you?

    4 Answers from the Community

    4 answers
    • ticklingcancer's Avatar

      Hey StegalMan, are you concerned that your fate will be the same? That's what I get out of your question. I can't imagine the stress you must be under thinking about that. I don't know anyone who passed away from my same cancer although I do know that people pass away from testicular cancer each year. It's a scary thing to think about while going through treatment but you have to remember that everyone is different. Age has a lot to do with it. You're young so I think your odds are significantly better than it could be. It's easier said than done but try to stay positive, keep the fighting attitude going. I don't know what stage your in but colon cancer is not an automatic death sentence. I bet you can find quite a few success stories. We can't cure cancer on here but we can talk you through it. That's exactly what we'll will do if you keep us posted on your progress

      over 7 years ago
    • Peroll's Avatar

      The realtives of mine that had colon cancer passed away several years before I was diagnosed so I have not had to deal with that. I have had friends passdd from cancer since my diansis and that is always hard. There is suvivors guilt and it makes you even more aware of how serious cancer is and what its goal is (killing its host). But I also remember that each person is an individual and that just because someone else lost the battle does not mean that you will too. I try not to connect any other cases to mine since they are all different. Remember people beat cancer every day. I choose to believe that I will eventually beat it rather than be too concerned about it beating me. While it is impossibe tl stay positive all of the time you only need to be positive more than you are negitive. It can be beat and you will be one of the people that beats it. Good Luck

      over 7 years ago
    • Carol-Charlie's Avatar

      When I was diagnosed 7 years ago with Stage IV Ovarian Cancer, an acqaintance from Church had been diagnosed a few months prior. She came to me immediately and shared her experiences thus far. She was 70 I was 62. We both went to the same clinic and had the same Gynicologic oncologist surgeon specialist. She had a female, I had a male. But both from the same graduating class... kids.... Thank God they were there. She chose not to try a 'new' - not experimental, but new method of delivering the chemo directly into the abdomine. (They would have had to place a port inside her and attach it to a rib) My sons and husband chose in the middle of my surgery to have it placed. The surgeon removed all the cancer he could see in me, the 39 lb tumor.. and where it had spread to my intestine and uretha. That is the only difference in our treatment. She passed three years later. Going to her funeral was the hardest thing I ever did. Her children came up to me, they hugged me, and were so happy that I was still cancer free. They sincerely were. Her husband will still stop me and chat and once in a while he'll ask how I'm doing... I'm a poet and I wrote this about how I felt... right after her funeral.

      Why Me?
      by Carol Notermann

      The tech had said excuse me. I’ll be back in just a bit.
      I lay there with my hand in God’s, and hoped this wasn’t it.
      A man walked in “to take a look” and it was then I knew
      That this cancer that I feared, was now in my life too.

      “OH GOD! WHY ME? I’m so not brave.”
      I screamed inside my brain.
      My family, my life, came rushing by –
      Like a loud and speeding train.

      I turned to God, still holding tight the hand that held to mine.
      And then the Lord did answer; His answer was sublime.
      “WHY NOT?” He said - as he still held tightly to my hand.
      “I’ll never let you go! See there are my footprints in the sand.”

      And together we did walk through those next two busy years.
      He gave me a special doctor. A doctor without fears.
      I listened and followed the doctor. His smile was warming to see.
      He and the staff at that clinic, were smiling always at me.

      And soon came the words I had prayed for, the words that filled me with glee.
      “You Carol are a “survivor”. All tests show you’re still cancer free.”
      I smiled and I laughed and I hugged, this doctor who God blessed with skill.
      There are no good words to thank him, but I know in prayer that I will.

      Then my mind went to the others, the ones who fought till the end.
      They fought quietly, valiantly - then went home to the Lord in the end.
      “OH GOD! WHY ME?” Why have I been so blessed? Why me?
      “WHY NOT?” was His simple response, and His Glory was all I could see.

      over 7 years ago
    • StegalMan's Avatar

      @ticklingcancer I have just been thinking about it a lot. Hard not to. @Carol-Charlie nice poem. Thanks for posting.

      over 7 years ago

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