• HOW LONG IS TOO LONG TO WAIT BEFORE SCHEDULING A DOUBLE MASTECTOMY FOR RECURRING DCIS? HAVE KNOWN FOR 6 WEEKS AND STILL NOT SCHEDULED YET AND GETTING A BIT NERVOUS.

    Asked by MAMADUKES on Saturday, April 14, 2012

    HOW LONG IS TOO LONG TO WAIT BEFORE SCHEDULING A DOUBLE MASTECTOMY FOR RECURRING DCIS? HAVE KNOWN FOR 6 WEEKS AND STILL NOT SCHEDULED YET AND GETTING A BIT NERVOUS.

    HAVEN'T SCHEDULED BECAUSE MY HUSBAND HAS BEEN TOO BUSY AT WORK TO FOCUS ON WHAT IS COMING. TRYING TO BE THE GOOD WIFE AND WAIT BUT I AM ALSO GETTING SCARED.

    10 Answers from the Community

    10 answers
    • leepenn's Avatar
      leepenn

      as long as there are no invasive cells, i think you can take a little time... you definitely don't want to wait too long, clearly.

      i recently did the double mastectomy, and i had a very good experience. i went home the next day, and i was able to do quite a lot soon after. i had no problems taking care of basic care - like getting something to eat or drink and washing up a bit. do you plan reconstruction? if yes, then my impression is that recovery is a little more difficult.

      i know other people who stayed at the hospital for two nights, and that seemed to work out well as well.

      everyone is different, but i really didn't need much help after going home. i was super surprised. i also didn't really have much pain, except for trying to sleep at night. i was even able to help out with the child a bit!

      the drains were a pain, but again, i was able to totally handle those on my own. my better half had expected to attend to my needs at a much higher level... but it turned out, i was self sufficient. it was no problem for me to be home alone... so my better half was able to go to work, attend meetings, etc... without worrying.

      i was back at work the friday after my surgery, but only for a half day. the week after, i worked at about a 60% level... one day was a relatively heavy day... and i was TIRED when i got home.... but really, the whole deal felt very manageable to me.

      do you have friends or family who can help? someone who can go with you to the hospital? i had friends at work who helped me carry things around etc... that was super nice. i only needed that for a week though.

      with your lumpectomy the first time - did you have any trouble with the anesthesia? did you experience much pain?

      good luck - i hope you are able to move forward very soon!

      almost 5 years ago
    • GRACENOW's Avatar
      GRACENOW

      Yes! Get what you need to do for yourself! I used friends and family as my husband, who is easily overwhelmed, became unavailable at times because he was afraid of losing me. While understandable...I still had to move forward with treatment, etc. and relied on those dear ones to help and they loved being able to do something. Your friends and loved ones do want to be of assistance!

      almost 5 years ago
    • hikerchick's Avatar
      hikerchick

      The others have covered a lot of good territory I agree with. Also, bear in mind that it can/may have progress/progressed to Stage 1. Mine did, in two spots. No good is likely to be done by waiting. Good luck to you!

      almost 5 years ago
    • sofarsogood's Avatar
      sofarsogood

      As I have posted elsewhere, the mastectomy surgery is nothing to fear. I also had a double, almost no pain, and active afterwards. You won't be able to drive, so stock up on necessities plus some gauze (4x4) sponges/pads. Drains are a major annoyance, but nothing you can't get through.

      Think about it, breasts are external They are not going to cut you open. You don't need breasts the way you need lungs, liver, stomach etc. It is one of the blessings of breast cancer.

      You will be FINE. The major things are incision care, rest, and nutrition.

      almost 5 years ago
    • susie81610's Avatar
      susie81610

      Make that appt and get moving don't wait on anyone. You are the important one at this moment. Sounds to me like you are very strong I'm sure you will be able to do it with the help of friends and family. Just tell hubby its time he can like it or not!
      Good luck to you
      Hugs Susie

      almost 5 years ago
    • jamrck's Avatar
      jamrck

      My sister-in-law told me this was one time that it was ok to be totally selfish. There's never going to be a perfect time for scheduling. I know it's scary for your husband too but it's not going to go away. My suggestion would be to tell him that you're going to schedule the surgery, then do it. Hopefully he'll rise to the occasion.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Jen2d's Avatar
      Jen2d

      Mine was a Stage 1 infiltrating lobular diagnosed Feb. 2 and I'm just now having double masectomy and a DIEP flap recon. My dr. did take out the cancer on an excisional biopsy, but she also said that cancer takes 100 to 200 days for one cell to multiply to 2 cells, so its not a medical emergency. There's time, but there also is pre-op testing to go thru and any over the counter pills to get out of your system so when you want to schedule your still looking at 3 weeks or so out, so tell the dr. you want to schedule. You're sure to find people who can help if your husband is not ready to handle it. Your bravery in going forward will give him strength also.

      almost 5 years ago
    • MAMADUKES's Avatar
      MAMADUKES

      Thank you all so much for your forthright answers. I understand his fear and need to focus on his work but I also understand that this is something that I HAVE to deal with and the sooner the better. If I have to do it without his support, I am learning to call on others, all of you included, for words and strength. I am also working on contingency plans for help after the surgery. We also have my 92 yr old father-in-law living with us and his alzheimer's has recently gotten a bit worse. Timing is everything right? Anyway, I am getting ready to move forward, alone or with someone!! Hope to have a planning session with the husband in the next day or so. Open his eye up a bit. Will keep you posted.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Sunnydays' Avatar
      Sunnydays

      Agree with above comments that the mastectomies themselves are not so painful but handling drains, pain drugs, side effects of anesthesia, and the surgery itself can be difficult - as well as any infections that could happen (I had one and it was very painful). The pain from my reconstruction surgery (putting in the muscle and skin expanders) was worse than the mastectomies themselves. There is also the emotional trauma - that you need love and support for! Hope your husband can work through his fear (and busy scheduled) and be there for you - or that you have friends nearby. My thoughts and prayers are with you!

      almost 5 years ago
    • DaveWaz's Avatar
      DaveWaz

      MAMDUKES,
      Thank you for your question. I hope all is well!

      Your question reminded me of some experience content we have on the site. One of the pages is about experience with a double mastectomy:

      http://www.whatnext.com/experiences/procedure/double-mastectomy

      One more thing, is I wanted to let other WhatNexters know about our Beginner's Guide to Cancer, which includes a guide on how women chose between a lumpectomy and mastectomy.

      https://www.whatnext.com/cc/how_we_chose_between_a_lumpectomy_and_mastectomy

      Best of luck to all,
      David

      over 3 years ago

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