• I am always depressed with having cancer

    Asked by Garfield on Tuesday, June 11, 2013

    I am always depressed with having cancer

    17 Answers from the Community

    17 answers
    • Clyde's Avatar
      Clyde

      I think many of us here understand how you feel. But staying in a depressed mode won't help you beat it. Try and find some help or an outlet for your feelings. Find a shrink to help (hopefully one who doesn't rely on drugs---you can tell them up front that you don't want drugs. That sets the stage. Drugs should be the last choice (I know they help many so I'm not saying "No" period.) but I don't want them for me unless they are the absolute last resort. And that goes for any drug for any situation.). Good luck with this, but know that what you are feeling is normal.

      over 3 years ago
    • OwlSearch's Avatar
      OwlSearch

      Hi, Garfield. This cancer status is new to me too. Occasionally, I have dark moments, especially when dealing with the heaviest physical side effects of chemo. Do you have family/friend support system? I went to a Look Good Feel Better class shortly after being diagnosed. Although, I haven't seen those women again, it was great to be a part of the free class with free gifts & great tips & especially, great to be surrounded by other women who had come before me. I am glad that you are reaching out. I know another woman, personally, who had CC, like you. I think she is in her 60s. She is just about to reach her one year post treatment status & is going to do a zipline with her daughter. Physically, I never would've thought of her as the Zipline type of woman. But, I'm happy for her conquering status. I hope you feel better soon.

      over 3 years ago
    • SueRae1's Avatar
      SueRae1

      Ask your oncologist for a referral to a therapist who is trained to see cancer patients I found it very helpful in dealing with the emotional as well as the day to day navigation issues. I was lucky the hospital I am being treated at has a free 12 week program for qualified cancer patients. I still see her as needed for booster sessions every few months.

      I also got a Pharma consult to a doctor who specializes in treating cancer patients. He put me on low levels of anti-anxiety meds, to take every day as well as a low dose of sleeping meds to take as needed after my infusions (steroids really kept me awake for 2-3 days).

      over 3 years ago
    • CrazyHarry's Avatar
      CrazyHarry

      Garfield, I have rectal cancer and I've been through the neo adjuvant chemo/rads and surgery and now just starting out on my chemo and I'm just not feeling good. The pain, the fatigue, unknown, etc. I have been very depressed and sad to the point of crying. My wife tries to be supportive but I'm convinced that nothing can help when I'm feeling like I do.

      Went to a could do support groups which didn't help. Who wants to hear about the misfortune of others going through the same thing? I thought I did. NOT!!

      Here's my plan. Make sure I take enough pain meds to get me through. Wife is a big help. Rest when I have to. When I feel good enough, get up and go for walks and/or some other exercise. Try to find one thing good in every day.

      My wife has a great cancer therapist in mind that I may go talk to. No commitment there but I may just do it.

      So far thus sounds all great being post 1 week after chemo and I hope I can keep to it.

      Check back in a few weeks and I may be using your posting.

      So keep up on your meds, do a little exercise, find something good in each day and plow right through this.

      Everything will get rectified in the end. (Even tell stupid jokes)

      Good luck and best wishes on your healing journey. I'll be looking for you on here.

      Harry Butt

      over 3 years ago
    • itsjustme736's Avatar
      itsjustme736

      Garfield all of us here at one time or the other has said WHY ME how did I get pick for this journey? But you can't let that get you down. You will have bad days "But It Is What It Is". Just hold on tight for the ride. If you look up the American Cancer Society you will find numbers that you can call and talk to a person, They will have support groups and programs also the YMCA has meeting for cancer patients free of charge. I think that you just need to know that you are not alone in this journey. An when you have a good day enjoy it to the fullish stop feeling sorry for yourself

      over 3 years ago
    • allier4's Avatar
      allier4

      My employer (Human Resources) has what is called HMS, a separate company that assists with many different type of work and personal problems. They have a number of different type of counselors for different situations and there is no cost. Don't know if this is helpful or not. The other thing that might help is journaling - I do this some and helps to put my feelings on paper. Just a thought. Feel better!

      over 3 years ago
    • LauraJo's Avatar
      LauraJo

      Hi Garfield,

      I looked at your profile....no wonder you are sad, having recently lost your dad to the same disease you now have. This diagnosis must stir up all kinds of emotions for you, over & above the ones all cancer patients feel. I can only tell you that during & post treatment, a lot of us have suffered from depression, and gotten treatment either through talk therapy or drugs. Do whatever you need to do to make you feel better & give you strength to fight this disease. Check with your oncologist or cancer center, to see if they can refer you to a doctor or therapist who works with cancer patients, or possibly, a religious counselor. You are going to go through a whole roller coaster of emotions as you progress through treatment, but try to remember that your are fortunate to have caught this early - you are a survivor right now! Keep talking, either to a professional, your family or friends, and/or to folks here. We'll do our best to help....and maybe tell you a few bad jokes along the way :)

      over 3 years ago
    • kelley_gleason's Avatar
      kelley_gleason

      I think having a good therapist is a must. It seems that it's often too much for friends or family because of their own feelings and fears around cancer and death and dying. My therapist wasn't a specialist in working with cancer patients but was very comfortable talking about death and dying, which in turn made me more comfortable with it and ultimately led to me learning to live more in the moment and appreciate every one of those moments more fully. that led to living more happy, and it just seems to spiral from there. I've lived more fully in the last 5 years, challenging and overcoming things I never dreamed, and that all stemmed from the same place you are at. I definitely have my times, especially when exhausted or not feeling well, but my husband reminds me that even pain and sadness is temporary if I want it to be.

      over 3 years ago
    • geekling's Avatar
      geekling

      It is a part of grief.

      At some, hopefully soon, point, you will be spurred to action and go from despair to desperate.

      The only good thing I can think of about cancer is not having it.

      What are you doing about divorcing with it?

      over 3 years ago
    • nocancer2013's Avatar
      nocancer2013

      Cancer diagnosis was an emotional roller coaster ride (at least for me), and that is normal. But once I discussed it with my doctor, researched it out, as well as talking with family, pastor, & friends... a lot of the fear subsided. I got involved in a cancer support group at my church and also American Cancer Society. It helps to talk with others who have been there and will encourage you.
      Surround yourself with POSITIVE people! Watch funny movies to relieve stress. Write down several things each day that you are thankful for, and journaling helped me get my feelings out. Above all, remember God loves you, and is walking with you through this time.

      over 3 years ago
    • catherinemarr's Avatar
      catherinemarr

      Im a year into the diagnosis of colon cancer,,,,noooo joy at all for months,anxiety mostly,and depression won for several months ,,,then I finally sought emotional support,wish I HAD DONE I THAT SOONER,but I thought because I had no money,or insurance Icouldnt get the care I needed,I was soooo wrong,there is help out there,you only need to seek it out,my sister helped me find help.....and IM eternally grateful for her and the other group of family and friends who rallied to the cause,I believe in asking for help from professionals in these serious times of emotional crisis GOOD AND WARM THOUGHTS HEADED TO YOU cath

      over 3 years ago
    • catherinemarr's Avatar
      catherinemarr

      Im a year into the diagnosis of colon cancer,,,,noooo joy at all for months,anxiety mostly,and depression won for several months ,,,then I finally sought emotional support,wish I HAD DONE I THAT SOONER,but I thought because I had no money,or insurance Icouldnt get the care I needed,I was soooo wrong,there is help out there,you only need to seek it out,my sister helped me find help.....and IM eternally grateful for her and the other group of family and friends who rallied to the cause,I believe in asking for help from professionals in these serious times of emotional crisis GOOD AND WARM THOUGHTS HEADED TO YOU cath

      over 3 years ago
    • SandiD's Avatar
      SandiD

      Please make sure you speak to your oncologist about what you are feeling. It is important! Also your cancer center should have a Social Worker associated with them that can direct you to help. We all go through those feelings while having cancer, specially when we don't feel well. It is a lot to face! I was blessed to have early colon cancer, but the surgery and recovery were hard. A year or so later I was diagnosed with Invasive Breast Cancer and went through surgery, chemo and radiation. I know those depressing feelings. I found an online Yahoo group that really helped me. And sometimes I just cried! It is ok! We have to get those feelings out and I did work through it. Now is time for you. Do something you like during the moments you feel up to it. Be patient with yourself. I wish you the very best.

      over 3 years ago
    • Garfield's Avatar
      Garfield

      My doctor called me with my lab results, seems my cholestrol is very high. Has anyone had experience with taking Statins? I read the side effects which don't appeal to me.

      over 3 years ago
    • juleegill's Avatar
      juleegill

      I have had two cancers. Thyroid cancer and Breast cancer. Faith--praying--meditating help the most. Talking to family/friends is second on the list. Staying busy and living life is the third biggest help. I use Ativan when I have an anxiety attack or am feeling really really anxious. It also helps me sleep.

      over 3 years ago
    • RobbieFlores' Avatar
      RobbieFlores

      Dear Garfield, you are going to beat this . It took a year and a half but I kicked cancer's XXX. stage 4 . Sure it wasn't easy and yes I had my bad days and shed some tears but with great support from family and friends I made it. And you will too. You are not alone. Come back here as often as you need to and this community will always be there for you. Always. Good luck and kick that cancer's butt! :0)

      over 3 years ago
    • Ydnar2xer's Avatar
      Ydnar2xer

      The others are right, Garfield. We've all been through this, and it's TOUGH. It sounds like you haven't reached the "acceptance" stage of the grief process yet. We are ALL very different people. But one thing that helped me TREMENDOUSLY was to realize , "Hey--there are LOTS of other people in my chemo room who are a LOT worse off than me!" (And I've had b/c TWICE.) So it somehow became my "mission" to try to cheer some of them up. I did it by--OK, so I was after some attention--wearing the goofiest looking wigs I could find. And it often worked. I'd get a lot of laughs or at least smiles--from many other patients getting chemo. And making THEM happier made ME much happier. I'm still wearing goofy wigs to my Herceptin treatments. But it's been hard to top my Viking horned helmet with the blonde braids! Good luck to you, Garfield--and remember, sometimes when you try to help others, you end up helping yourself as well. We're here for you!

      over 3 years ago

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