• I feel extremely anxious about my chemo that is to begin on Tuesday.

    Asked by Kathy on Friday, October 19, 2012

    I feel extremely anxious about my chemo that is to begin on Tuesday.

    I am to begin chemo on Tuesday and am totally dreading entering that phase of my journey. This is for a recurrence so I have done this before. I wonder if the side effects will be the same or worse or better. The anxiety I am feeling is making me crazy. Some one just said to me - have a nice weekend!! Made me cry. I know I can and will get through this but the anticipation has been dreadful.

    27 Answers from the Community

    27 answers
    • ticklingcancer's Avatar
      ticklingcancer

      Chemo....that stuff is horrible. I remember when I started back in December. I finished my 12 week treatment in February of this year. I was so glad to be done. I'm sorry you're having to go through it again. I'm sure there isn't much that can be said to ease your anexity. I hope this round is easier on you. Good Luck To You and Keep us posted. We can all talk your way through chemo and hopefully it will make it fly by. You'll be in my prayers!!

      almost 5 years ago
    • dvdbriansr's Avatar
      dvdbriansr

      My God darlin' once in a lifetime should be more than enough for any one person. Believe me when I say I can truly understand your anxiety and apprehension about beginning Chemo Therapy as I just went through my very first ever Chemo Treatment yesterday. The treatment ended at about 3:00 pm, so I wheeled myself out crawled into my van and went home like I'd just been to another long meeting. Don't mean to scare or worry you, but at 1:39 am, I woke from the best sleep I'd had in a long, long, long time. YEP a hopeless insomniac, mostly attributed to chronic pain, before cancer. My stomach was so rumbly tumbly that I didn't know what to do. I got up and took the Compazine and Ativan they prescribed and within about an hour it settled down enough that I no longer felt like heaving my guts up/out/over. Never did get back to sleep, although later that morning Stripes, the smaller, more lovable of my two cats curled up with me on my couch climbed up and put her head next to mine and began purring me a love song, and we both fell asleep for a couple of hours. The free falling tears I've found are just uncontrollable, certain scenes in movies, certain songs played on the radio, or someone can just say something seemingly totally Innocent and they just come flying out. That's an "uncontrollable" response to the way too many emotions that you've got going on right now. From what I understand is that it's the "combination" of Chemo drugs used in your individual treatment plan that causes the side effects, maybe this time you'll get lucky and get a combo that won't make you feel so bad. Try to stay positive, hold your head up, 'less your sick of course, then be sure to point it downward. Walk Tall and carry a VERY big stick. Wishing you the very best on your journey, may it go as painless as possible. Just keep your last statement in mind at all times " I know I can and will get through this but the anticipation has been dreadful." Anticipation, ignorance (on my part) and the NOT knowing what's next or what's it going to do to me, have been my major downfalls. Keep something with you to occupy your mind and hands and I think you'll do just fine. I'm sure you know what stress and anxiety can do to a person, mentally as well as physically. I was a complete space cadet for almost 2 months when it was suggested that I may have cancer. The day I was told that I did in fact have it, I went completely and totally numb! Now, I'm taking it on with everything I have and will continue to do just that. Just as I suspect you will too once you've had the chance to "come to terms" with it. We all reach that same point in many different ways and the time needed varies just as well. Ever need to talk, just look me up, I got a feeling I'm going to be hare for a while, besides, I am looking for a friend or two.

      almost 5 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN (Best Answer!)

      Kathy, I had a recurrence and started chemo again, the second time around was nothing like the first. It didn't make me as sick. Hopefully you will get some smoooooth drugs, no sick stuff.

      And I know how it is to be in the funk and have someone all cheery tell you to have a nice day. Makes you want to smack em around, but, they are just trying to be nice to you.

      We all wish you the best, please check in after you get started and let us know how you are!

      Greg P
      3X Survivor
      Team WhatNext
      Community Mgr.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Kathy's Avatar
      Kathy

      Greg - you made me laugh. Yes I want to smack em when they say have a nice day. I'm encouraged by you that the second time around wasn't as bad. Thanks for cheering me up.

      almost 5 years ago
    • JudyS's Avatar
      JudyS

      I loved the smack em comment too! I think if you weren't anxious and going crazy about starting this chemo process up again, that wouldn't be normal!! Take as many deep breaths as you need to keep your sanity. I hope the time until you get there goes quickly and all goes well!

      almost 5 years ago
    • SueRae1's Avatar
      SueRae1

      Sending you virtual hugs. Chemo's a B*tch, ain't know way around it. Of course you are feeling fragile and vulnerable, and that's ok. Once you start things may get better, because you are no longer in the "anticipation stage". I have been on chemo for 3+ years - fighting two advanced cancers( kidney and breast) till May on was on oral meds for the kidney cancer, but since they discovered the breast cancer metastasized in early May, I've been on infusions - I started my 2nd cocktail (the first had mixed results) - side effects and energy levels were/are different for each treatment plan, heck each cycle is different as well. I find the side effects of the steroids have the most impact on my day to day life, especially 24-72 hours after my treatment. Keep us posted we are here to help and support you.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Kathy's Avatar
      Kathy

      I have a few different questions posted on the boards here. Where do I post for those who want to follow me? And what if there is someone I want to follows?

      almost 5 years ago
    • tnblondee's Avatar
      tnblondee

      I was so anxious before I started chemo too because I didn't know what to expect. After I had my 2nd treatment and realized that Chemo days were going to be the good days I started driving myself back and forth. Since you've been through this before did you have a bad experience the first time and how long ago was it?

      almost 5 years ago
    • JudyS's Avatar
      JudyS

      I saw your question about following someone, click on their name and it will take you to the person's page. In their upper right corner, you can select to follow that person, you can also see who that person is following if you are curious. The people who want to follow you need to do the same thing, go to your profile page and select to follow you. I hope this helps.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Lirasgirl33's Avatar
      Lirasgirl33

      Kathy, sending you virtual hugs. I'm going through another round of chemo myself since the cancer came back and metastisised to my lungs. I too hate to have to do it again but we gotta do it love. I'm hoping like Greg said that this time around it isn't as bad. This time around isn't as bad for me so I'm glad. I'm on Cisplatin/Taxol every 3 weeks. You can do it! Let's do this! Let's kick this cancer in the rear!

      almost 5 years ago
    • teddyfuzz's Avatar
      teddyfuzz

      Hi Kathy. I'm so sorry that you are having to go through this again. If it were up to me, no one would get cancer, especially not twice. I am crossing my fingers that the side effects this time around will be minimal. Xanax helped me with the anxiety. I'd pop a couple of those right before chemo and they seemed to help. They don't make you feel loopy, just kind of relaxed - it takes the tightness out of your chest. And feel free to vent about anything here! No doubt that there will be a few people who feel the exact same way.

      I swear, the next person who tells me that pink-tober (ugh) is "my month" is going to end up with my foot in their you-know-what.

      almost 5 years ago
    • packerbacker's Avatar
      packerbacker

      Good for you for moving forward! I just got home from my chemo - it took 6 hours, including IV hydration and Magnesium. I'm so sorry that you have to go through this again. I wish I could take away your anxiety and help you to smile. Feel good that you're fighting, and use your people around you to keep you busy this weekend. Try to do something fun. Like Greg said, his second time at chemo was nothing like his first time. Hopefully, that will be the same for you. Everyone reacts so differently, it's hard to tell. Please keep us posted as to how it goes for you. Many hugs your way!

      almost 5 years ago
    • Kathy's Avatar
      Kathy

      Thank you all of you for responding - it means so very much.

      almost 5 years ago
    • SpunkyS's Avatar
      SpunkyS

      Good luck with the chemo "Round 2".

      almost 5 years ago
    • Ydnar2xer's Avatar
      Ydnar2xer

      My onc has definitely changed his chemo routines in the past 10 years or so. Instead of 1 week chemo, 2 weeks off, he gives me TCH once one week, then TH once each of the next two weeks, then back to the TCH. So far, my side effects have been minimal, although the TCH days do kick me around a bit.

      I'd suggest putting together a "chemo tote" with crossword puzzles, a trashy celebrity-type magazine (for laughs), a favorite blanket or stuffed animal and some hard candies in it. I leave mine in the hall closet, but it's always ready to go on Tuesdays and it's reassuring to me to have it there.

      BTW this is my second time around with cancer as well. All of us two-timers (or Greg, a 3xer!) should pool our money and buy some lotto tickets!

      Good luck. Lorazapam will calm you down. My chemo day is Tuesday, too, so I will be thinking of you.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Beaner54's Avatar
      Beaner54

      My chemotherapy was tolerable but I found external beam radiation to be miserable.
      I am hoping treatment for this recurrence will go okay for you Kathy. Perhaps the drugs won't be as
      potent this time.
      Sending hugs.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Rosa's Avatar
      Rosa

      Kathy, when I was receiving chemo my sister-in-law gave me the best advice. "Cry whenever you feel like crying. You are entitled to it after all you are going thru." Even if you have to hide in the shower like I did. My husband and daughter didn't want to see me cry. You will feel better and ready to keep on fighting.
      This is just temporary. You will feel better, you know you will. It is just so difficult to think you have to go thru it all again.
      Be brave, positive, we all have you in our thoughts and prayers.
      God bless you

      almost 5 years ago
    • Kathy's Avatar
      Kathy

      It's been challenging because my incision has been running into complications with its healing. I feel I'm not going into this with as much strength as I would have liked. My spirits do feel better in having found this website and with all of your encouraging responses. Thank you so very much.

      almost 5 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN

      Thanks everyone for giving Kathy the information she needed. This is a perfect example of why our little community is helpful.

      Greg P
      3X survivor
      Team WhatNext
      Community Mgr

      almost 5 years ago
    • nobrand's Avatar
      nobrand

      Hey Kathy, good luck on your upcoming treatments.. I can certainly understand your anxiety..

      I often come here, just like you did and share my experience... it really does help quell some of my anxious feelings. I also enjoy hot teas, books and fluffy kittens. I indulge in these things as much as possible..

      I still haven't found the perfect fix for all of the worry and stress.. when you find it, please share!!! :)

      almost 5 years ago
    • Carol-Charlie's Avatar
      Carol-Charlie

      Kathy... Take a deep breath, ask God to help you through your fears. I asked him to take my hand a lead me to where he wanted me to go. I had Stage IIIC Ovarian Cancer.... I am here now.almost 7 years since diagnosis... cancer free. Chemo is not easy. But when you think of the lives it saves... it is GOOD! Yes you'll probably lose your hair... get a wig. You'll be tired, take a nap if you can. Since Chemo is cumulative... side effects will be about the same. I have neuropathy in my feet and it hasn't gone away. Vit. B12 helps with the discomfort... AND you've found us. We'll be here cheering you on each day if you wish!!!!

      almost 5 years ago
    • Carol-Charlie's Avatar
      Carol-Charlie

      Oh...I forgot to mention that my oncologist said to stay ahead of the symptoms of side effects.... If you get a drug to take an hour before... take it an hour before.... Once the sypmtoms of nausea, etc. hit... it's harder to stop.

      almost 5 years ago
    • myb's Avatar
      myb

      Anticipation of a recurrence of a cancer is feared by anyone who has gone through cancer. I just finished 12 rounds of chemo last month and am waiting for my 3 month checkup to make sure I am still cancer free. It's something I have put out of my mind and continue to think positive.

      But when I was going through chemo, I would start taking a 1/2 of ativan for anxiety the night before chemo so I could sleep and not wake up nauseous and exhausted before even starting chemo. You should talk to your doctor about your anxiety so you can stay as strong as possible to manage this next journey and win!

      almost 5 years ago
    • carm's Avatar
      carm

      Kathy, I am an oncology nurse and perhaps I can direct you to a website that may help you. It is chemotherapyadvisor.com and it has all the information you might need regarding your treatment. To the right of the homepage, half way down you will see a table of cancers and their regimens. Just click on the one that matches your needs and it will tell you all about the treatment you are concerned with. It is a valuable website and free to join. I suggest you bookmark it for later use. Try to relax and contain those feelings of anxiousness if you can. Whatever your treatment regimen, try to remember it is suggested to help, not harm you. That should always be a step in the right direction. If you have any questions, I am always here, Carm.

      almost 5 years ago
    • geekling's Avatar
      geekling

      My cancer woes were over 10 years ago. I endured 16 weeks of radiation and two rounds of chemotherapy. A drowning kitten had more strength and endurance, at the time, than did I.
      Your body reacts to being poisoned, plain and simple. We have cell and muscle memory and I doubt that your body is happy to be going into this position again. You made it through once before and you will again but perhaps it is time you did some research (later, when you are recovering) to find out what you can do, how you can be proactive, to make sure you are not ever in this position again. Better to cry than to repress your feelings. The words "Have a nice day" from a stranger are meaningless platitudes. Your feelings and worries are very personal. Just breathe. Breathe again. You might want to look into a therapeutic (seated) yoga class to help deal with the anxiety. Best wishes for recovered good health.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Fusionera's Avatar
      Fusionera

      Hi Kathy,

      I understand your anxiety, as I have had a few recurrences of my own cancer. Is your oncology team using a different chemo drug this time? Is it IV chamo or can you take pills? Perhaps you can obtain Ativan or something else for your anxiety from your oncologist. Keeping you in my prayers.

      almost 5 years ago
    • kkelly111's Avatar
      kkelly111

      After hearing I had cancer I knew the only way to get better was to get the chemo. I went in every time happy to get my rounds because I had 2 kids that I needed to fight for. Is this going to be fun? No...but remember what the reason is, without it the cancer will continue to spread. There will be many times that you will cry and many days that you will get mad, you are much stronger than you can imagine. The first couple of rounds I was up cleaning house like crazy, steroids make you move, you will get more tired as rounds progress but YOU CAN DO THIS!!!! Good Luck

      about 4 years ago

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