• I have been devastated that my family has been less than supportive, especially emotionally. Has anyone experienced anything similar?

    Asked by Effiemae on Thursday, August 16, 2012

    I have been devastated that my family has been less than supportive, especially emotionally. Has anyone experienced anything similar?

    I know everyone has to deal with this in his or her way, and maybe denial is one of them.

    6 Answers from the Community

    6 answers
    • KFH's Avatar

      Effiemae - I understand your frustration with your family. I, too, have had similar disappointment with my sisters. My mom has been wonderful, but lived 400 miles away and I try not to worry her too much. My sisters, on the other hand, have been emotionally distant and very consumed with their own lives. i.e 'living life as usual'. I've spent alot of energy trying to figure out why they are being this way, then I realized, I needed that energy for mysefl to heal and get through my treatments. Plus I may never be able to figure out why and in the end, it may not matter. I have a few 'friends' too that have essentially vanished. I'm concentrating on surrounding myself with those that truly want to help me and have compassion for what I'm going through. Good luck to you and I encourage to you keep your good energy for yourself and getting through what you need to and letting go of the negative energy - from others, from worry, disappointment, etc. You can do this! Make yourself your number 1 priority.

      over 8 years ago
    • BuckeyeShelby's Avatar

      I have always been one more for family of choice vs family of blood. I've been concerned about a good friend's reaction until I realized that my diagnosis is as traumatic for her as it is for me. I've been very calm since my diagnosis last month, but I realized that I'd be much more upset if it had been her. And some folks "don't get it". Places like this are a good place to find those people who do get it. I haven't started seeking a support group that meets in person, but I'm strongly considering doing so as I move through treatment. The best of luck to you.

      over 8 years ago
    • RnayRiv's Avatar

      Yes I know how you feel. I hate when I want to talk about what I'm feeling and they change the subject. Makes me feel like they don't care. Or when they start to talk about someone else cancer and how they are doing really bad. So I'm like okay my experience doesn't matter because I was only stage 1. So I just keep all my feeling to myself now.

      over 8 years ago
    • bjriise's Avatar

      I have been very lucky that I have my mom supporting me. I do not know what I would do without her. I have 2 sisters who who I hardly hear from. One of my sisters acts very weird every time I talk to her. It is like she can't deal with my diagnosis at all so she ignores me. My oldest sister is always busy. My friends that I thought would be there to help me through this have all been very distant they are "too busy" to even keep in touch. My Fiance helps some but I can't even really talk to him because he says it upsets him too much to talk about it. He is "too busy" too. My 24 old daughter does not know how to deal with me being sick so she is in denial too. I have had strangers be more supportive than my family and friends. It is very depressing.

      over 8 years ago
    • DreamyKath's Avatar

      I have had a very similar experience. I figured out that I have always been the one to take care of and emotionally support everyone around me, and they've never had to do it. It inconveniences them now that I am the one who needs the support. I haven't even spoken to my sister or brother in months. I don't blame them. Most people don't know what to say. My daughter has been less than helpful around the house, although when it comes to support I have to say that she's been the one who has taken me to most of my chemo infusion appointments. She even hangs out with me the entire time. Try not to let others bum you out with their lack of support. They don't really understand.

      over 8 years ago
    • martyjean's Avatar

      I am having the same issues. My son has been fantastic...has done all the driving to appointments In Boston....no easy task! My husband.....does not handle any of this good. I have stopped talking to him about it as it ends in a fight. I feel like I am inconveniencing him,..in sickness or in health, but only if its convenient? Am so glad to have found this sight.... On the other hand, all my sisters, brothers and Mom have been wonderful....I am blessed in this area...

      almost 6 years ago

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