• my emotions

    Asked by kimba9584 on Sunday, June 19, 2016

    my emotions

    this is my 5th day since my first chemo i think my emotions are getting the better of me i'mm just feeling so low i'm a positive person dont like this feeling try to change but well tell me this will pass don't like to be weepy been fighting my whole life

    28 Answers from the Community

    28 answers
    • Lynne-I-Am's Avatar
      Lynne-I-Am

      kimba9584, chemo is scary, but now you have one less chemo treatment ! it's in the rear view.Thinking like this helped me get through my chemo. You are going through some tough times so be kind to yourself. Let the emotions flow when they need to. We are all different and all we can do is the best we can . Keep your doctor posted on the side effects, drink, drink, drink, eat what you want, rest when you want. You have a whole community of people who "get it". Please continue to reach out and share as needed, We are here.

      about 5 years ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      Kimba9584, I think you will get your emotions in check after you have time to come to terms with everything that's happening to you. It is a very traumatic life event to be diagnosed with cancer and to have chemo. Hugs. Give yourself a break!!

      about 5 years ago
    • SandiA's Avatar
      SandiA

      Hi, I went through some very weepy times, I asked my doctor once if it was the steroids and he said yes and the whole situation. He told me to hang in there and give myself a break and i did and it got better. It can be so overwhelming at times. Hang in there and I wish you all the best! Sandi

      about 5 years ago
    • KB2013's Avatar
      KB2013

      Kimba9584, I'd ask to speak to a social worker who can tell you about the support groups that may hold meetings at that center as well as other sources of support and I'd also confide in my chemo nurse whatever my emotions might be when I'm getting chemo. I used to bend my nurse's ear as if she were my hairdresser--lol I wish you strength, courage and calm as you continue on with your treatments.

      about 5 years ago
    • kimba9584's Avatar
      kimba9584

      thank you all its is all happening fast its only been like a month since breast removed now them chemo 4hour everyother week so that the hard stuff then hopefully the chemo i get after that wont be as bad thank you

      about 5 years ago
    • fightforlife's Avatar
      fightforlife

      Kimba, you have been through extreme physical and emotional trauma in the last month and it is totally normal that you would be extremely "weepy", angry, sad, anxious and anything else you can come up with even before starting the chemo. That said, the chemo comes with steroids which are wonderful for minimizing some of the side effects of the chemo but they also have their own issues. Steroids made me much more emotional including being more short tempered than normal. My family had a hard time understanding that it was the drugs making me so "snappy". They also kept me awake all night the first night. I had 12 rounds of chemo and Lynne-I_Am is right, chalk it up to 1 down # to go.

      about 5 years ago
    • Carool's Avatar
      Carool

      Kimba9584, adding to everyone's great answers, I'll say what others said: Let yourself feel whatever you are feeling - unless you get so depressed that some counseling and maybe an antidepressant will ease your suffering. Your "negative" feelings won't affect your health. During my chemo, I ran - trudged - the gamut of feelings, from terrified, very sad, depressed, hopeful, relieved, very scared (again), etc. I never felt especially angry at having developed breast cancer, as angry was my default mode even prior to diagnosis (LOL!).

      Wishing you everything good in your treatment, and of course we're all here for you -

      about 5 years ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      I went through treatment in Zombie mode. I believe your reaction is the more normal reaction. Please don't waste your precious energy trying to be positive. You need all your energy to fight cancer. Cancer really doesn't care whether you are positive or negative. During cancer I often wished I could cry. But I was taught to be a Zombie. As Carool says embrace your feelings There are several Blog posts on this site dealing with mood swings. So you can assure yourself you are very normal.

      about 5 years ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      I would encourage you to call your oncologist and/or your Primary Care physician and tell them how you feel. It's very common for breast cancer patients to need an antidepressant due to hormone changes, in addition to having cancer As somebody else said, a support group would probably help you, too.

      Best wishes on this journey. Remember treatment is temporary, and things then get back to normal (almost).

      about 5 years ago
    • CAS1's Avatar
      CAS1

      were you given a pre chemo cocktail? Chances are very good it contained high amounts of steroids and many many people have real withdrawls after just one use.

      If you can discuss cutting this down for your next chemo..I took a bit less than 50% of the first dosing because I was flying off the walls and then crash and burn..My chemo nurse said many people do all their house work during chemo time because they have so much energy from the roids high.

      Treat yourself when ever you can with something positive and fun..something you would normally not give yourself..tie a positive experience with your chemo sessions and reward yourself..really..do for yourself like you have never done..

      You can also ask for a bit of Ativan to take the edge off..try to only take a few times per wk because it can cause a habit if taken more than that. but it does help.

      about 5 years ago
    • ChildOfGod4570's Avatar
      ChildOfGod4570

      Kimba9584, what you are feeling is perfectly normal. When I was going through chemo, I had my good days and my bad days. I would be dancing in church on Sunday morning and crying into the phone with my mother that very same afternoon. I know sometimes we're all taught to "be positive", but that tends to draw away from the license to release our sadness, anger, confusion, stress, and self consciousness that often comes with going through cancer treatments. Pamper yourself whenever possible; maybe even buy yourself something nice. When I was in a wig shop buying a stand for a wig, I noticed an inexpensive tiara that cost less than my hair cuts did. I know I was a long way from wearing it, but it gave me something to look forward to wearing when my hair grew back. I even wore it to a party while I still needed my wig! Chemo is traumatic, so please tell your nurse about your emotions; she should tell you if there is cause for concern or if you're just going through a normal phase. HUGS and God bless!

      about 5 years ago
    • MelanieIIB's Avatar
      MelanieIIB

      It is very normal for your emotions to take a roller coaster ride during this time and to stay at the bottom longer than usual for you. In addition to the steroids and chemo, you recently had a mastectomy so your body has been through the trauma of surgery plus the drugs that were given to you at that time...anesthesia, pain meds, etc. I am also usually a positive person, but through all the cancer treatments and surgeries I definitely had my moments of emotions going up and down. Drink lots of water because if you are dehydrated in any way, that can also effect your emotions. Make sure to tell your oncologist about your emotions so he/she can monitor them and if needed, give you something to get through this time or possibly adjust some of your medication. I would also suggest listening to music with positive, encouraging themes, work puzzles or word finds, etc. to get your mind focused on something else. If you are physically up to it and enjoy crafts, painting, drawing, or some kind of hobby, consider making something for someone and putting your focus on that person and what you can do for them. I have found that sometimes that helped put my mood back on to the positive side. Please keep us updated to let us know how you are doing.

      about 5 years ago
    • Razmataz's Avatar
      Razmataz

      ok Kim, From one non-emotional person to another...
      Chemo has changed my hormones and emotions. I too am a pretty positive person and have a pretty good perspective on things that come my way. When people ask me how I am, I always smiled...just because thats what I do...even when I'm not ok. I remember the first time I walked into the clinic for chemo. The fd asked how I was...I started crying... they said its ok...this happens, went to the blood draw...cried again,I then saw my Dr. started crying again...Then went to chemo... the nurse said how are you doing...I said don't ask unless you want tears... I hated/hate it to this day. However, like everyone else has said...try to embrace it. You are going through an incredible amount in a short amount of time...physically and mentally. I have to be honest as I wish that someone was with me on this...I really broke down emotionally after the chemo/radiation treatments... At that point I increased antibiotics and other meds. So don't hesitate to reach out for that help... Hang in there!

      about 5 years ago
    • PinkPeony's Avatar
      PinkPeony

      The hardest time for me was after my first chemo. After the first treatment, the doctor gave me some lorazepam for the duration which helped me sleep like a rock. The third day after each chemo was always the worst. You are right in perceiving that it messes with your head. I felt like I was on another planet and was profoundly affected by any emotional situation. Anti-depressants make me feel horrible, so if they aren't for you, consider asking your doctor for lorazepam or something that will help you sleep. It is habit forming, so you will probably need to wean off of them when you are done with chemo, but I think it was worth it. Chemo is the absolute pits, but at some point you will be done. Try to focus on that finish line. Hugs for you Kimba.

      about 5 years ago
    • Ydnar2xer's Avatar
      Ydnar2xer

      Hi Kimba. I too, sympathize with the feelings you are having right now. But I disagree with some of the others who say it isn't that important to stay positive. I think being positive is contagious--and when you are positive to others---EVEN WHEN YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE IT---it returns even a greater amount of positivity to you. I think being positive is a win-win!!! So how to stay positive?

      Do things that make you happy! Call a friend to meet for lunch. Buy a goofy hat that makes you smile to cover your bald head! (I have a Viking helmet w/horns to which I attached yellow yarn "braids") Watch a silly old movie that makes you laugh. Wear bright colors that cheer you up. Get a pedicure w/a wild color of polish and then show them off! Study some jokes on the internet that you can tell to the nurses. Bring cookies to share w/others at chemo who probably feel a lot like you do, right now. Pull a practical joke on someone you know!

      When I did chemo, I was feeling pretty low (depressed), but found when I took the trouble to try to cheer others up a bit (usually by wearing my goofy costumes--like my super-heroine "Captain Chemo"), their responses always cheered ME up as well! Almost everyone smiled at my costumes and some said I "made their day"! Can you imagine HOW GREAT that made me feel? Indeed, a win-win FOR ALL! Good luck. We are here for you. Please let us know what works for you.

      about 5 years ago
    • Bug's Avatar
      Bug

      I have not had chemo so do not feel qualified to respond. I would like to say, though, that it seems like a huge range of emotions - mostly dark emotions - would be the normal thing at this time. I'm so glad you're reaching out. My oncologist referred me to a counselor who specializes in cancer issues. She really "gets it". Maybe you'd find it helpful to speak to someone like that...? Thinking of you and wishing you the very best. Please let us know how you're doing.

      about 5 years ago
    • PinkPickle's Avatar
      PinkPickle

      Hang in there! You are perfectly normal. As a fellow strong fighting woman, I completely understand how you feel...but this nasty disease can play with your emotions...not to mention what the steroids do to your sense of humor!
      I felt like I was on a roller coaster , which is NOT like me at all. I can't even recall all the times I cried for " no good reason".
      It's part of the process and I think a small part of that is still with me, 6 years after completing treatment . I'm still very strong and still a fighter...but there's a softer side to my strength that I never had before....and I kinda like it...
      Best wishes for you in your treatment months and beyond!

      about 5 years ago
    • andreacha's Avatar
      andreacha

      Even though I may not have the type of cancer that is the subject of a question covers ---- I read nearly each and every question and answer. Kimba, I bet you didn't think yesterday that you would have 19 answers within 24 hours. I just wanted to say to Greg and all of you that we have the best community at WhatNext - one who takes the time to offer knowledge and comfort to so many people with this terrible disease. This is a community to be proud of. Andreacha

      about 5 years ago
    • kimba9584's Avatar
      kimba9584

      thank you all feeling better maybe crash from steroids but my head in better place today guess each time will be different this chemo is only until end of july next will be a once a week hope it wont be as strong on my list of question i write them down as soon as i think of them thank you all

      about 5 years ago
    • rachelarmom's Avatar
      rachelarmom

      I'm sure the steroids and other treatments have an affect. I am not a weepy sort, but when I have had the flu or some other hideous virus, I cry often. I think it is just from feeling achy and tired and helpless about it. I think it helps.

      about 5 years ago
    • lh25's Avatar
      lh25

      Kimba, I agree with so many of the answers you got. It's normal, and something to talk to your care team about. I had a friend who did go on anti-depressants and that helped a lot.

      I get weepy easily, and also angry that I have cancer and have to do the treatments. But I've learned the best thing for me is to feel those feelings, allow myself to cry or rant, then I can move on and be more positive again. What we are doing is hard, it's OK to feel that.

      about 5 years ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      I. H. I greatly envy you. I was taught to live my life in Zombie mode. Or for you Star Trek fans I was taught to be like Spock. I was taught that it was not ladylike to either laugh or cry. During my treatment my daughter begged me to cry.

      about 5 years ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      Kimba, be sure to discuss this with your oncologist or your primary care physician as soon as possible, because it may be COMMON, but not necessarily normal (as in good or optimal). This is 2016, and I think they would likely offer you an antidepressant or other medication to make you feel better.

      You shouldn't make yourself go through what you don't have to when we have modern medicine to help. Your doctors are there to help you through this, so take advantage of what they offer. Best wishes to you.

      about 5 years ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      BoiseB, have you heard the country song by Miranda Lambert about her mama teaching her not to cry---it's cute!

      about 5 years ago
    • Bug's Avatar
      Bug

      lh25, the same goes for me - I have found that the best thing for me is to feel the feelings, allow myself to cry and/or grieve the situation and then I can move on and be more positive. It isn't good for me to stuff my emotions. Tried that - doesn't work (for me).

      about 5 years ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      Hey, Bug, I think she's saying that she felt the feelings and cried and couldn't move on. If the steroid causes it or her depleted hormones cause it, and it comes back again, her doctor may be able to help.

      about 5 years ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      @BarbarainBham No I have not heard that song. Classical music is my music of choice but I do enjoy Country Do you have a link to YouTube

      about 5 years ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      BoiseB, you can Google Miranda Lambert's "Mama's Broken Heart." and click on a video.

      about 5 years ago

    Help the community by answering this question:

    Create an account to post your answer Already have an account? Sign in!

    By using WhatNext, you agree to our User Agreement, and Privacy Policy


    Read and answer more breast cancer questions.  Also, don't forget to check out our Breast Cancer page.