• My grandma decided to do a third round of chemo even though round two was almost unbearable for her. Any thoughts?

    Asked by Mollie on Thursday, July 19, 2012

    My grandma decided to do a third round of chemo even though round two was almost unbearable for her. Any thoughts?

    12 Answers from the Community

    12 answers
    • nancyjac's Avatar
      nancyjac

      It is her decision to make.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Mollie's Avatar
      Mollie

      Absolutely...other thoughts?

      almost 5 years ago
    • nancyjac's Avatar
      nancyjac

      I'm not sure what kind of other thoughts you are looking for. Can you be more specific?

      almost 5 years ago
    • Mollie's Avatar
      Mollie

      Sorry. I guess it's that the 2nd round almost did her in. It's quite likely that this round will be worse and has been already. I'm just worried for her quality of life. She can't even go to the restroom without having to rest. The chemo will make her even weaker. I guess I just needed to talk this out

      almost 5 years ago
    • rickbr's Avatar
      rickbr

      Do you feel confident in her doctors? They should be able to tell whether she can handle it and it is her decision.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Mollie's Avatar
      Mollie

      Thank you

      almost 5 years ago
    • CaptainBob's Avatar
      CaptainBob

      As one who would agree with your grandma I would say that it her decision. I have pancreatic cancer and spend every moment of every day fighting to get it gone from my body. What you should do is have an open and direct talk with her to find out why she wants to continue with treatment. If her reasons are sound she will likely find the strength she needs to tolerate the next round of chemo. I have had three different cocktails and actually found the latest the easiest to tolerate. Give the girl some room and support her decisions as long as she has good reasons for making them. As someone else said it really is hers to make.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Mollie's Avatar
      Mollie

      I have always told her it is her decision to make. And I will continue to do so. It's just scary. It doesn't look like shell make it through this round. Thank you

      almost 5 years ago
    • Bellamore's Avatar
      Bellamore

      Chemo is tough, no doubt about it. Maybe acupuncture would help her through, or professional massages. I've been doing acupuncture for only two sessions and already my energy level has increased. Makes me just kind of feel good all over. Good Luck

      almost 5 years ago
    • Mollie's Avatar
      Mollie

      Oh wow. Thanks for the advice :)))

      almost 5 years ago
    • majgirl's Avatar
      majgirl

      I am learning very quickly that every cancer patient, family member or caregiver has a very individual story. That is as it should be as we are all individuals with our own back stories, beliefs and personalities that impact how we deal with this. As your grandmother is 80 and opting for another round of chemo despite round 2 being "almost unbearable", it appears she is clearly not ready to give up on this life. She may have such a zest for living that she is willing to do battle until the very end for the sake of living despite the pain and discomfort of the treatment. She may have unfinished business, such as knowing that her children or grandchildren will be okay. I don't know her story or yours, but if this was my grandmother I would be talking with her, spending time with her and learning all that I could about her. I think that it is okay to let her know that you worry about her decision and why. As you have that discussion you will likely learn more about what makes up your grandmother, and in return about who you are. My own mother just this past week was told by her surgeon that whatever decision she makes in regard to accepting or declining further treatment it will be the right one, and regardless of her decision I will be right there beside her, as I know you will be for your grandmother.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Mollie's Avatar
      Mollie

      My grandma is and always has been more like a mother to me. We spend at least some time together everyday. Fortunately we have both been very honest and upfront with her disease. I thank you for your post. I will continue to have open, honest talks with her.

      almost 5 years ago

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