• No treatment

    Asked by Connie1950 on Tuesday, May 21, 2013

    No treatment

    My mother is 82. She has chosen to not have any treatment. The dr that did her colon test said she had a rare rectal cancer and that she was not healthy enough to withstand treatment. This was in Feb 2013. My mother has diarrhea constantly. She is getting weaker each day. She has been hospitalized 3 times for blood transfusions and bladder infection. Yesterday she was running a temp of 102. Gentiva person said she should go to hospital. The Dr said for her to go to ER. She was too weak to sit in ER and wait, it was packed. Dr said didn't have time to do orders for her to go to admissions(which has been done in past). She had just been to Dr on Friday 17th. Her skin is around her personal areas and legs is raw from feces and urine. Dr didn't even take her temp on Friday or check skin.We have been using bag balm. I can't believe that there are not things this Dr can do to make my mother more comfortable. Only thing she has done is stop her fluid meds so she won't have to reduce urine

    7 Answers from the Community

    7 answers
    • BuckeyeShelby's Avatar

      Have you looked into hospice care for your mom? The main goal of hospice is to keep the patient comfortable. Might be something to look into, if the doctor will give an Rx for it. Good luck to you. I hope your mom is feeling better soon.

      about 5 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar

      I'm so sorry your mom is having these troubles. I don't know how persistent or boisterous you have been when in these situations, but I learned that these people at the hospitals at the desks, some nurses, and even some Dr's are just employees and will act like a typical employee unless you get busy making them take notice. I found I got a lot better help with my Mom and Dad, both who had similar problems due to cancer. It doesn't always work, but I will not just sit and wait while someone has a little cut on their hand and Mom is in serious condition.

      You might have to start being a nasty person, don't think bad of doing it. Your mom needs you to do whatever it takes. This of course is assuming you haven't already done this. Which in that case your just another person in the line waiting.

      Again, sorry. You might ask @carm if she knows of anything you can do when going in the er that might speed things along.

      about 5 years ago
    • ticklingcancer's Avatar

      So sorry to hear of the problems your Mom is having. That breaks my heart. As Shelby suggested, you might speak with her Dr about Hospice. Good luck to you.

      about 5 years ago
    • GypsyJule's Avatar

      My heart goes out to you and your Mom. I agree with Greg and Shelby - Get mean. Your hospital should have a patient advocate that might help, and you are your mom's best advocate. Hospice may be able to help make her more comfortable, and may help avoid those trips to the ER in the first place. We ususally think of hospice as that last resort, but from my understanding, they can be available for paitents for a longer period of time than you might think. I hope your mom has found some comfort and relief, and hugs to you. I'm sure nothing could be worse than watching a loved one not getting the care they deserve.

      about 5 years ago
    • CAS1's Avatar

      Go right to the Hospital Administrator . Call them or better yet go into their office and see them.
      Demand that your mother sees Hospice "RIGHT NOW" .

      I was in hospital once before my cancer.. Was not getting the treatment I should have so I picked up the phone and called the administrator and demand she come and see me..I was then treated like a person...It works

      about 5 years ago
    • Flowers55's Avatar

      For us the National Cancer Institue has a great chat - just closed on week ends - if she is that sick why not call an ambulance??? Also when I was bed ridden they used a nice spray made specifically for that - does not need to be rinsed - I saw someone take this spray (but they also have cremes, soaps and a foam that makes my best friends rear after surgery feel good) put in in a large size freezer zip bag, shack it up with warm water and you have a mini-sink to wash from - does you state have a Center for Aging - is there a Senior Center close by - they have information about agencies - and I even received information that really helped my daughter - that fecal problem can also be very dangerouse germ wise - re: e.coli - again if the Doctors and everyone say she needs to be in the hospital - call the ambulance -

      about 5 years ago
    • KarenN@StF's Avatar

      All good suggestions that have already been made. Would add that getting a new physician might also be part of the answer. Choosing to forego treatment doesn't mean there is nothing to be done to give your mom the best quality she can have for whatever times she has left. Everyone deserves compassion. Good Luck!

      about 5 years ago

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