• Stress

    Asked by MicheleP on Tuesday, April 2, 2013


    Some days I feel so overwhelmed by the bills and the fact that I can never in any near future time, take a vacation. Absolutely no money. Then I feel I dragged my husband into a life of bills. Anyone else feel this way and how do I get out of this funk?

    7 Answers from the Community

    7 answers
    • fastdog's Avatar

      I'm very fortunate in that, so far, my insurance has covered everything. So I can't give any advice on that, only sympathy. That said, I sometimes do think that my husband didn't sign on for this cancer thing, and all the stress it puts him through. But, he is in it for the long haul, and for that, I am profoundly grateful. All I can do in return, is be as cheerful and upbeat as possible. As cancer patients, in a way, every good day is sort of a vacatiion. Having endless bills is both stressful and depressing. But, you can only do what you can do, and pay what you can pay. Worrying about it is the normal state of affairs, unfortunately, but it's never solved anything yet. All I can suggest is that you try to list all that you can be grateful for whenever things get you down. I started doing that every night before going to sleep, and after a while, I found the list was longer than I ever would have thought.

      over 3 years ago
    • JennyMiller's Avatar

      I feel that this is a situation where you have to attempt to adjust your attitude -- it is not easy as this world seems to base happiness on money. However, each day of life is a gift -- you cannot put a price tag on it. These may be lean times but you have each other. My husband prides himself on the fact that he has enough Life Insurance to take care of me when he passes. I hate hearing that - I cannot imagine my life without him -- I have been with him since I was 16 -- married at 18 -- I would not know what to do -- all the money in the world could not compensate for my loss. Money and material things do not bring true happiness -- and you cannot take them with you when you pass. Family and love are enduring. I know it is easy for me to say this -- I have health insurance that is covering most of expenses. However, I truly hope that I could have a positive attitude if I were faced with your dilemna. I will keep you in my prayers. I wish you the best.

      over 3 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar

      Good morning Michele,

      Click on the resources tab at the top right of the purple bar. Look through the available listed resources and start doing some leg work. It isn't easy, you can't just call up a donor and get a check the next day. There is a lot of paperwork involved to prove that you are not just some nut job that is trying to get funds, drugs, resources for free. It's sad, but these institutions that try to help us have to weed these type of people out and it makes it more difficult for us. Contact the american cancer society in the resources link and ask for a patient navigator. They will start a file on you and search through their available resources for things that may help you. Then, read through the many posts on this questions page and you will find the same question asked by many, you are not alone. Look at, copy the links to the many resources others have already provided. You can find lots of help, but it is a lot of work. I spent 2 years looking for help with some extreme dental issues, but finally did get help.
      I hope you are able to find some help on your issues. Best to you on it!

      over 3 years ago
    • JudyW's Avatar

      I know the feeling completely! In addition, I have to deal with an ex-husband who stresses me out even more. It is absolutely true that our world seems to be based solely on money. I have just bought a book called "The Secret Language of Your Body" which discussed the role of stress on our bodies. I'm hoping that, with some disciplined work in this book, I can reduce my stress and, thereby, reduce the likelihood that my awful cancer will return.

      over 3 years ago
    • sweethart2912's Avatar

      I have been fortunate enough to be in a clinical trial, that paid for the med's and my husband's insurance covered the rest. but I do understand the stress in knowing the bills and wondering where the the money will come from. The biggest stress for me was having my husband not know how to help me when he wanted to. I did not worry about vacations, I had fighting on my mind and vacations could wait until I was better. Contact support groups and Leukemia & Lymphoma Society they were a great help for me. Think about all the reasons you have to fight.

      over 3 years ago
    • dls1007's Avatar

      To be honest with you, all the years I've been going through this, since 1993, I just don't worry over the bills. I pay what I can and I don't let it keep me from taking a vacation. You need to be able to enjoy life and go on vacation. I figure as long as I'm paying something, I'm showing them I'm trying. Sometimes my phone is ringing constantly because I owe some hospital something, but I've gotten to the point I can't worry about it. I figure if I do pass, I have enough life insurance for things to be paid off. You have to enjoy life and try not to worry about these things.

      over 3 years ago
    • LisaD@StF's Avatar

      MicheleP For patients and families impacted by cancer, there are not only emotional and physical concerns; there is also an overwhelming – and often unexpected – financial burden. if you do not have insurance then I would check into Medicaid, here is the link
      ( www.dhs.wisconsin.gov/medicaid/) If you have insurance and the co-pays are the issue then there are some resources to check into and maybe even more that are only available locally that I am not aware of as I am in Indiana. If you are over 55 BenefitsCheckUp is a free confidential, online service of the National Council on Aging (NCOA). The online service will ask a series of questions to help adults over 55 who need help paying for prescription drugs, healthcare, utilities, and other basic needs and identify programs and benefits that could help.
      ( www.benefitscheckup.org ) AVONCares –[phone number redacted] ) Grants of $100 to women in treatment. I would call the American Cancer Society also to see if they have and help available to you. The Pink Fund- (www.thepinkfund.org ) : If you meet their criteria they help to replace lost income through paying creditors directly. Patient Access Network Foundation- (1[phone number redacted] or www.panfoundation.org ) : Currently only assists with Metastatic breast cancer or chemotherapy induced neutropenia. I would also check with this site and their 2 listed resources to see if they can directly locally to any other resources. (http://www.cancersupportcommunity.org/MainMenu/Cancer-Support/Find-a-Local-Program/Wisconsin.html ) Not sure where you are in your journey but I hope that 1 of these will offer some benefit to you, I wish you well.

      over 3 years ago

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