• Support

    Asked by KTsSupport on Saturday, May 11, 2013


    My Partner just began Chemo this past Thursday. Is there anyone who is the caregiver for someone with breast cancer?

    6 Answers from the Community

    6 answers
    • JennyMiller's Avatar

      Hi, I am Ed and have been caregiver for Jenny for over a year. At the time of her diagnosis, I was in the hospital with a broken back so it was hard to help with the physical chores but I found that I was able to take over some household duties such as laundry, dishes and vacuuming, etc. The most important part of my job, as caregiver, was to love, support and encourage her. A positive attitude is absolutely essential and I made every effort to nurture that. During the dark period, after diagnosis - before surgery, when she would weep during the night, I would just hold her and let her cry. When she wanted to talk about it, I would listen. When she did not want to talk, I would fade into the background and allow her that solitary time. I would try to get her out of the house for a ride or for dinner -- so often, she would not want to go but would give in and always felt better afterwards. I would constantly pray for her and would do everything to bolster her faith and hope. I would do little things for her that made her comfortable and conveyed my love such as -- rubbing her back & feet -- applying hot cloths to her bald head and then massage it, etc.
      Caregiver is not an easy job -- chemo side effects can be hard to deal with. It is not easy to see the love of your life enduring all of this -- the part of the Marriage Vows "in sickness & health" applies 100%. I know that she would do the same for me. Jenny now has her surgery, chemo and radiation behind her -- she has her hair back -- and feels good. She had her follow-up scans last week and is "cancer free". It is through the power of prayer that the Good Lord brought us both through this storm. I wish you the very best in your role.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Nonnie917's Avatar

      Somewhere with in the board a person gave us a lot of referrals do a search. I know one that was mentioned was the American Cancer Society (ACS). You can call them and they will probably have all the answers to your needs and questions.

      almost 5 years ago
    • Kossmore's Avatar

      Ask her what she needs or wants you to do. Any chores you can releive her from will be helpful. Ed nailed it with his comment. She will need more emotional support than ever. Your partner will benefit from going to a support group in person. The online support groups are wonderful, but live people respond immediately to the emotions she is feeling and the new ones that come up from discussions with other people.

      You should also learn as much about the treatment as you can, when going through treatment, you brain is scrambled and many times the person doesn't remember things. You can go with her to all of her treatments for her (emotional support), and take notes. You may not be able to sit with her if there are many treatmeants going on at the same time, even if you sit in the waiting room she knows you are there for her. She should probably not drive herself to chemo treatments because it zaps your energy. ~Hugs coming your way!

      almost 5 years ago
    • KTsSupport's Avatar

      Thank you all so much. I really appreciate it. I think I am trying to find answers to something that there just aren't answers for. I wish I could just take it away but I can't. :(

      almost 5 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar

      Hello and welcome to the site. We have several caregivers here on the site. By going to the people tab www.whatnext.com/users you can click on the search tab on the left and click on caregivers in the role, and get a list of all caregivers on the site.
      We also have a WhatNexter with a website, book and lots of helpful information on being a caregiver. His website is www.robcares.com and his page on this site is @robcares

      If you have specific questions just ask, I'm sure someone will offer some help.

      almost 5 years ago
    • SandiD's Avatar

      Take a look at www.breastcancer.org. There is info there for patients and their families. God bless you for even asking this question! I can only suggest you be sure to take care of yourself too. Good luck.

      almost 5 years ago

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