• What are your tricks for staying HAPPY everyday? When you wake up and you're already in a bad mood what do you do?

    Asked by Julesmom on Wednesday, November 7, 2018

    What are your tricks for staying HAPPY everyday? When you wake up and you're already in a bad mood what do you do?

    With the daily grind of life, work, family, and dealing with cancer at the same time, sometimes it gets hard to stay "perky" and happy. Do you have any "magic happy beans"?

    33 Answers from the Community

    33 answers
    • po18guy's Avatar
      po18guy

      Drink heavily? Mind-altering drugs? Actually, I use an ancient, time-tested method of spirituality. But no one wants to hear about it. So, let's see how others compensate.

      12 days ago
    • LiveWithCancer's Avatar
      LiveWithCancer

      I wake up grateful for the new day. Thankful for the little things and the big things. How lucky I am to have a home, my family, my faith, my pets, my friends. I am grateful that today I am NOT eating my salad from the roots up.

      Listen to happy music. Watch a comedy. Sing. Exercise. List the things for which you are grateful Those are my magic happy beans.

      I know so many people who are fighting for their lives; their time is running out; new treatments just aren't available. They have young children or grandchildren - so much they want to live for - and yet, it just isn't looking good for them. I know that they would do almost anything to have my daily grind compared to theirs.

      12 days ago
    • ChicagoSandy's Avatar
      ChicagoSandy

      "Happy" and "perky" were never priorities for me. Staying on an even keel has always been my goal. If you prioritize chasing after happiness, you're going to be disappointed whenever you can't "catch" it. And disappointment keeps you from noticing and appreciating the good stuff. I just try to do things I enjoy and cope with the things I don't.

      12 days ago
    • Carool's Avatar
      Carool

      I strive to feel secure rather than happy (well, I'm happy if and when I feel secure). By "secure" I mean not filled with anxiety about: our current political situation; possible illness or other bodily threats to me or my loved ones; money worries; art-making obstacles...you-name-it. Yet I DO feel secure and happy when I have nothing arduous ahead of me next day and can indulge in watching YouTubes,TV, talking on phone, eating, drawing on Photoshop, being with my partner and not arguing or fighting, reading, sleeping! Above all, SLEEPING and dreaming!

      12 days ago
    • cllinda's Avatar
      cllinda

      Music can make me happy. I have a fun local radio station with two amazing morning dj's that crack me up. When I was fighting, it was my go to place to forget about what I was dealing with and just enjoy their show and the music.

      12 days ago
    • whatnext54's Avatar
      whatnext54

      Try to keep busy. Pushing through the day knowing this too shall pass.

      12 days ago
    • JaneA's Avatar
      JaneA

      I am grateful to be alive 4 years after a Stage IV diagnosis so I'm determined not to waste a single day. I stay busy doing all of the things that I put off doing because I was too busy before. I walk every day and carry my camera with me to capture something beautiful or unique. I'm learning to watercolor. I have a Facebook cooking page. And I'm working on my second book. If you do what you love to do, there won't be time for negative thoughts.

      12 days ago
    • ChildOfGod4570's Avatar
      ChildOfGod4570

      For me, I wasn't thinking of being happy or perky while in active treatment; I just wanted to feel normal again. Especially when I was on chemo, I had ongoing reminders of illness in the form of hair loss and that icky chemo taste in my mouth to name a few. What helped me most was keeping busy and finding destractions from cancer. This came in the form of crafting, computer projects, watching Little House On The Prairie or The Waltons, and talking to friends. Sometimes I even napped and feltso much better after having done so. HTH HUGS and God bless.

      12 days ago
    • Jouska's Avatar
      Jouska

      My treatment, surgery, chemo, hormone therapy, helped me learn not to sweat the small stuff and to be kind and grateful. When you've had chemo, does the line at the grocery store matter? Saying thank you or being helpful can make someone's day - I know it made mine when I went through treatment. I think when one has had any serious illness it really makes one think, what is important? I am fortunate, I came through treatment with minimal long lasting side effects. I can live with a bit of neuropathy, some scar tissue and stiffness. I don't find a need to be perky (I never have been perky) however, I just try and spend my energy on being kind, being useful, being thankful and enjoying my life every day.

      12 days ago
    • macfightsback's Avatar
      macfightsback

      I have goals and when I meet them I am happy. Some are the usual household duties, some are about maintaining my health, some are fun goals, planning time for me to recharge. Like going to a good movie, watching birds and squirrels at my bird feeders, photography ect. I recently have lost 11 pounds. I am very overweight. Every pound I lost is s reason to celebrate. Every mile I walk. You get the idea. Take time for yourself. You deserve it.

      12 days ago
    • fiddler's Avatar
      fiddler

      I decided (yes, it's a DECISION to be happy, sad, etc.) to stay neutral through chemo and rads. My husband stepped up to the plate - he worked 12 hours at his professional job, and did everything at home but wipe my butt. Couldn't have done it without him.

      The church was useless (like Gandhi said, "I never met a christian" - leave it at that). Strength comes from being quiet and waiting for a higher power (as the Indians say) to assist in our travail. How we deal with adversity determines who we are. Be peace and it will return the favor.

      12 days ago
    • MsMarty's Avatar
      MsMarty

      po18guy - I'd like to hear about your ancient, time tested spirituality.

      12 days ago
    • Gumpus61's Avatar
      Gumpus61

      I struggle with this each and every day. My wife of 37 years is slowly dying from a terminal Cancer I cannot stop. 5 years of fighting to find a little bit of happiness in each day, while the future is an uncertainty I can ill afford to even dream about. While my lovely bride looks for meaning in a life where cancer has taken all but her dignity I end up forcing a smile and crying in the car. Maybe that is the answer.....Happiness inside of Cancer is just hard work. It sure is for me.

      12 days ago
    • Lynne-I-Am's Avatar
      Lynne-I-Am

      Why do we have to be happy everyday? Like anything else we experience on a daily basis we would appreciate happiness less if we always had happy days. I have ups and downs, bad, fair, good, better and best days. I love ,

      12 days ago
    • po18guy's Avatar
      po18guy

      @MsMarty Quite simply, I'm a Catholic boy. I know the value of suffering. I have as role models the great Saints who suffered far more than I for their love of God. Saints from the Apostles to Teresa of Avila, Kateri Tekakwitha, Catherine of Siena, Bernadette of Lourdes and Maximillian Kolbe. Martyrs, many of them. But, this is a very tough, trying time for the Church, as evil men have crept in. In that regard, I pray for healing, repentance, cleansing and justice.

      11 days ago
    • CASSIEME1's Avatar
      CASSIEME1

      I don't know about happiness i'm to busy trying to make it just putting one foot in front of the other. I realized a few weeks ago that I am tired of faking in front of people so that they are uncomfortable it's not about them. life is to short to dwell on things. So I don't ask people to do for me family or church because they always have an excuse. so if I can't do it today I try again another day.

      11 days ago
    • lisahal's Avatar
      lisahal

      My dogs are so happy to see me every morning, Hugs and kisses and happy dances. Do you have a dog? I do not watch the news anymore. It is so depressing so I listen to a lot of music. I go to work come home and work in my garden and have a beer and a joint. I go to the beach a few times a month, my happy place. I smoke a lot of weed and stay positive even in LA traffic. Find your happy place and find something that you love to do. Being outside and just sitting in the woods makes me feel better. I have no control when I am going to die so I always try to find fun. Go have some fun!

      11 days ago
    • ChicagoSandy's Avatar
      ChicagoSandy

      I would love to be able to tune out the news and just listen to (and play, sing & write) music, but there's just too much at stake not to pay attention. This is a crisis rapidly snowballing (I won't say which side I'm on, as this is supposed to be an apolitical thread). But let's just say that being aware of one's larger surroundings is now an obligation of citizenship. So I comfort myself with reasonable amounts of good food, and do acrostics & diagramless crosswords. (And watching all the series episodes stored and piling up on my hard drive). "Happiness" is an oversimplification--I'm aiming for satisfaction, sanity, companionship and love.

      11 days ago
    • po18guy's Avatar
      po18guy

      @ChicagoSandy for decades I was hyper-political and profoundly unhappy. I turned it all off. Newspapers, the media, radio, TV, you name it. Gone. Now, I read, do my hobbies and contemplative and meditative prayer.

      I am much happier. Taking a page form the Serenity Prayer, why worry and fret and shorten our already shortened life span over things that we cannot change and which, in the long run, make little difference?

      I encourage you to try it.

      10 days ago
    • Carol1286's Avatar
      Carol1286

      I always wake up in a good mood. I'm the perky person at work that coworkers and clients see first when they come into the office.

      10 days ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      We only have the right to pursue happiness not the obligation. I have always had better things to do than "be happy" However to shield others from stormy days I have developed very dark sense of humor. That's not exactly "perky and happy" but it is enough to shield others from my darker side. And I don't have to fake "perky and happy" which I am unable to do.

      9 days ago
    • ChicagoSandy's Avatar
      ChicagoSandy

      Well, if enough people follow the news, participate and vote, then that is a thing we CAN change. And in the long run, at least during our lives (and our kids and grandkids), that can make a MAJOR difference. The wild card in the Serenity Prayer is to "change the things we can change"....and the courage and determination to make the difference. We have too much at stake to bury our heads in the sand--locally, nationally, and globally. (And taking my civic duties seriously helps take my mind off my cancer).

      9 days ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      Bad puns are a great way to develope a dark sense of humor

      9 days ago
    • ChicagoSandy's Avatar
      ChicagoSandy

      Gallows humor is, at the end of the day, still humor. (As are sick jokes--as long as they aren't at others' expense).

      9 days ago
    • Carool's Avatar
      Carool

      I so agree with ChicagoSandy: that we have too much at stake now. Also, if my head is buried in the sand I won't be able to run if I have to.

      8 days ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      I'm not unhappy, but if I was I would get a doctor's referral to a Counselor to be paid for by insurance. They're professionals who know what to say to make you look at things a different way. They're available to you, why not use them?

      Taking medicine to reduce estrogen could cause depression, so you also need to ask your doctor if you need an anti-depressant.

      Like po18guy, I avoid things that stress me, such as my sister, and being a Christian gives me peace about my future.

      8 days ago
    • Ashera's Avatar
      Ashera

      It is ok...to not be happy or perky all the time. I much rather prefer to be honest and who I am and authentic - and some days - are a bit grayer than others. It's all part of being alive. I'm not necessarily ...sad, but rather...quiet and introspective. For me - that gives me strength. I can't fake or joke my way to a mood that makes others more comfortable.

      6 days ago
    • BoiseB's Avatar
      BoiseB

      @Ashera I totally agree with you. But sometimes it becomes necessary that one either hides ones mood or simply hides. I use the hiding technique a lot I just avoid people cancel activities etc. Otherwise, I have my repertoire of gallows humor.

      6 days ago
    • Ashera's Avatar
      Ashera

      BoiseB.... Oh yes! The ol' gallows, dark, witty, sarcastic humor! Works for me every time! and I do understand about hiding. Sometimes places are just too people-y and I have to retreat. It's easier to not offend someone that expects me to be all upbeat, positive, and...phony.

      6 days ago
    • po18guy's Avatar
      po18guy

      @ChicagoSandy Ah yes, of course, but everything in moderation! 50% of the nation is either delighted, or uteraged or depressed at each election cycle. Is this good for our mental health? There are some things which we must let go of, as the rotation of the world is not dependent upon our individual actions. We must first see that our conscience is properly formed, then vote our conscience. Ultimately, politics is not the solution - it is much more the problem, actually.

      6 days ago
    • ChicagoSandy's Avatar
      ChicagoSandy

      Sometimes voting one's conscience has unfortunate unintended consequences for everyone--including that particular voter (not naming names or parties). I'm a pragmatist, and prefer to see the big picture. For that, I need to be as informed as possible. Being in the dark about that would make me crazy, not happy.

      6 days ago
    • po18guy's Avatar
      po18guy

      Well, in any group, I am the weirdo, so I am used to being odd man out. That is because I'm just plain odd. I was a political activist, but realized that most are NEVER happy.

      "Most" I said.

      We have been artificially brought to the point where we are sharply divided between the rational and the emotional. I prefer to have the truth, so I ignore the media - who hates me and the way I think.

      As Green Day sang:

      "Don't wanna be an American idiot
      One nation controlled by the media..."

      6 days ago
    • ChicagoSandy's Avatar
      ChicagoSandy

      Different strokes for different folks, dude. Agreeing to disagree is healthy. (Of course, Billie Joe Armstrong may have been unaware that "the media" aren't monolithic: they're all over the place ideologically--maybe they weren't, back when he wrote the song. Great album, though).

      5 days ago

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