• What do caregivers do when a wife or mother loses hope after being diagnosed with uterine cancer?

    Asked by HardyGirl on Tuesday, April 30, 2013

    What do caregivers do when a wife or mother loses hope after being diagnosed with uterine cancer?

    I just don't want them to lose hope in me.

    5 Answers from the Community

    5 answers
    • FreeBird's Avatar

      I would say, you might bring the focus down from the long-term to the short-term. When we look too far ahead, it's easy to feel overwhelmed even when we do not have disease. My dad has a lousy prognosis with stage 4 pancreatic cancer, and is on hospice care. There is no looking 2 years into the future, in the same way that I cannot look 200 years into the future and feel hopeful for the chances of my body to still be around. But there is hope to have a good day tomorrow. There's hope for a trip to the park on the weekend. There's hope for pain-free days and management of symptoms to enjoy what you do have. Try to turn off the high beams and offer something to which to look forward in the short term. For dad, this is visits from family. Take one day at a time, and if that's too much, one hour at a time.

      Let her know that you are okay, and that you are also taking care of yourself. You might also give her the confidence that there is a plan to handle anything that comes up... that there are ways to manage symptoms and side effects.

      You are both part of something bigger than anything that can happen to the cells of your body. Best wishes to both of you.

      over 5 years ago
    • Kathy's Avatar

      Hi HardyGirl, I am a 2x ovarian cancer survivor and I have gone through times where I felt hopeless. For me what helped best is for anyone to just listen to what I was saying and feeling and really to not have any response. When in that hopeless state I don't want or need someone giving me false assurances that everything will be okay and to stay positive. That being said I can tell you I did not stay in that hopelessness state for long periods of time and I have also been getting professional help in those regards. I needed my space and eventually come to the conclusion on my own that indeed there is hope. That hope can be found in something as little as the grass turning green after a long winter. I'm kinda rambling. Hope that's okay. Take care.

      over 5 years ago
    • StrongSteph's Avatar

      Free Bird and Kathy have great thoughts on this! I think many people fighting cancer experience hopelessness at one point in there treatment. It is so HARD to fight cancer, mentally and physically and spiritually. I love what FreeBird said, focus on the short term. Hugs to you!

      over 5 years ago
    • Judit's Avatar

      I've learned so much from my support group, and your family will benefit from one, too. Do you have a Gilda's Club nearby? It's a wonderful help to everyone who is touched by your cancer.

      over 5 years ago
    • HardyGirl's Avatar

      Thank you all for your words, you make me feel so much better.

      over 5 years ago

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