• What's next?

    Asked by Janc on Tuesday, April 22, 2014

    What's next?

    Dr is reluctant to tell me how long my hubby has left. How can this be determined? I do not know what to expect or what to look for as the disease progresses more.

    7 Answers from the Community

    7 answers
    • lilymadeline's Avatar
      lilymadeline

      It can't be determined, that is why your husbands oncologist isn't giving you an exact time or date! Only God knows this, but it is beyond our knowledge. Sometimes people respond very well to treatment and defy the odds, and that happens more often than not. Other times people are gone quickly. The doctor can only make an educated guess that is all, but he has probably been wrong so many times that he hesitates to do that now. Because it really depends on how your husband responds to treatment and he won't know until he tries. I was supposed to be gone years ago myself but I am living with 'chronic cancer' and I am doing very well because I was lucky and responded to treatment. Some do and some don't and again that is really in God's hands. I hope that your husband is with you for a long time. All I can say is for you to follow the doctors orders to the letter, take care of yourself and your husband, and expect the unexpected. It is hard to make plans with cancer because there are always surprises and unexpected things happening, it is an unpredictable disease with a mind of it's own. Good luck and best wishes!

      almost 7 years ago
    • jib777's Avatar
      jib777

      I ran into an old friend at the infusion center (of all places) and her husband was given a certain time frame a few years ago and has far outlived it. Lilymadeline is right - it's in God's hands and also there are new clinical and proven drugs that are recognized each day. I have not been in your shoes but I wouldn't be afraid to get a second opinion. Gathering facts is a good thing and so is having confidence in the oncologist that you use. Many blessings on your journey!

      almost 7 years ago
    • cam32505's Avatar
      cam32505

      I think you just want to enjoy the good days, and get through the bad ones. When your husband is closer to the end, they will know more about that. Hospice usually has a good idea about these things, not sure if your husband has entered hospice yet. Take care of both of you.

      almost 7 years ago
    • Nana5's Avatar
      Nana5

      Janc, as much as we want the Dr's to give us a day and time they can't. When.... That is out of our hands.. only God knows when that time is for any of us. As difficult as it is for both of you live every moment knowing what blessings you have. I am a caregiver also and know how difficult it is to take care of yourself at these times. Listen to your heart and body and take care of yourself. I'm happy you have this to reach out to. Sometimes a voice to share with is helpful. Bless you both as you continue your journey.

      almost 7 years ago
    • Nana5's Avatar
      Nana5

      Janc, as much as we want the Dr's to give us a day and time they can't. When.... That is out of our hands.. only God knows when that time is for any of us. As difficult as it is for both of you live every moment knowing what blessings you have. I am a caregiver also and know how difficult it is to take care of yourself at these times. Listen to your heart and body and take care of yourself. I'm happy you have this to reach out to. Sometimes a voice to share with is helpful. Bless you both as you continue your journey.

      almost 7 years ago
    • skyhawkdriver's Avatar
      skyhawkdriver

      Today I went to see my Oncologist. The news was not so good. My returning PSA was .2 in November, and .4 in January. Today it was 2.5 and it is going up rapidly. My Doctor is putting me back on hormone treatment. He said that it would stop the growth. This is a holding action. On average, the hormone routine lasts for three years. He said that after that there would be any number of things we could try. My wife and I plan to spend the next three years actively.

      over 6 years ago
    • mgm48's Avatar
      mgm48

      Everyone is correct. No one knows. A friend has been on Hormones for nearly 30 years, go figure! For me, Hormones worked for 3 months. BUT chemo works better for me than most guys. AND lest you think some of these PSA's are the only ones that get treated, mine peaked at 1125.8 and went down to 22 before recently peaking again at 548. I'm down to 173 now. So what I'm telling you is that it's just a number and it does not predict all that much. While my doctor will tell me what the average survival for men in my condition is, he has not been in the ball park yet. So...

      Keep it positive and smile :)

      over 6 years ago

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