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    User: MaggieB

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    BrenB posted an update

    I still haven't told my mom about my cancer. I went through chemo & radiation without having to tell her but now that I will have surgery on Tuesday I think it's time. I just don't want my mother to panic, get dramatic, tell everyone and anyone or stress me more than I already am. I want to protect her but who's protecting me when she stresses me out?

    2 Comments
    • hjtobar's Avatar
      hjtobar

      Setting boundaries early on, and knowing that you are in charge is very important. You can tell her everything, or just a little. For my mom we had to set boundaries with our family regarding how many phone calls they could make and when, if and when they could visit that day, and we often would edit the news depending on who we were updating, etc. She is your mother though, and she is going to be upset. Cancer is very scary, and can feel life shattering. Just as you found your inner strength to handle this news on your own for so long, which is incredible, she too will have to find her inner strength as well. Tell her what you want from her, how she can help, and the things you do not want her to help with.
      Pick the time, place, and way in which you tell her. You are in control.

      almost 5 years ago
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN

      Hi BrenB, you will get lots more responses if you post this as a question in the questions tab. Hope you find the answers you need!
      Greg P
      Team WhatNext

      almost 5 years ago
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    User: cancerislame

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    User: AmyK

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    BrenB wrote on AmyK's wall

    Amy I really hope you can save either ovary. Radiation pretty much burned mine and yes being 36 and going through menopause sucks! If I'm going to be so hot & sweaty why haven't I lost weight??? I wish you all the luck & will pray for your quick recovery.

  • BrenB's Avatar

    BrenB shared an experience

    Oh No (Work problems): My surgeon gave me time off in between radiation & first course of chemo to recover for my surgery. Love the way my employer just cancels my disability (we have private disability insurance) before I'm even released back to work yet took 60 days to get me any money after my diagnosis. I'm sure administrative positions never had these issues when they had their cancer experiences! I guess the stress of having my surgery in less than a week doesn't help.