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    ButterBean asked a questionLung Cancer

    I don't feel comfortable with my new oncologist and his ideas. How do I tell him?

    4 answers
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN

      I used to do the same thing, when I was first treated. I didn't know any better, just figured he;s the doctor, must know what I need. That was 24 years ago, these days I am XXX on wheels when dealing with them. If they say something I don't understand, we don't move on to something else until I get answers. If I have questions, they get answered, I don't care how much of a hurry they look like they are in. I sat in the waiting room for an hour, then another hour in the exam room, they come in in a flash and are in and out in 4 minutes. I am going to get my time's worth.

      If you don't want to change yet, or don't know, go back, and ask questions. Don't get intimidated by the attitude, or the rush. Ask the question, look them in the eye and wait for the answer. Then next question, don't let him leave until you get answers. I wouldnt be put on a timeline to give an answer or a decision on something so important, if your not comfortable with the situation, tell him your going to get a second opinion since it is such an important life altering decision.

      Hope you get peace with the answers!

      over 4 years ago
    • nancyjac's Avatar
      nancyjac

      How did you end up with this new oncologist to begin with? What happened with your old oncologist? I would think any time anyone changes doctors, whether an oncologist or now, there are bound to be differences in both medical protocols and communication styles. The new doctor has to start with scratch with you and you with him. So he lays out his recommended treatment plan and you need to ask a lot of questions. I think you need to start though by asking yourself what is it that you don't feel comfortable with. Is it the change in oncologists, the new oncologist's communication style, or his medical competence? Once you have figured that out, you tell him exactly what you are uncomfortable with. It would be difficult for him to respond to "I am uncomfortable with you" if you can't tell him what it is about him that makes you uncomfortable. As far as ideas go, tell him what your ideas are and ask him to address why he thinks his ideas are more in your best interests.

      over 4 years ago
    • abrub's Avatar
      abrub

      Please write down a list of questions and concerns, and bring the list with you to an appointment (schedule one if you don't have one upcoming.) Insist that he respond to all of your questions and concerns. You hire him. You can fire him. I consulted with a dr who didn't listen to anything I said, and only glanced at the report I'd sent ahead. As a result, everything he wrote in his post-visit evaluation was wrong (listing medications I wasn't taking, family history facts, other material information.) Needless to say, I never went back to him. (Btw, his prognosis gave me a maximum of 5 years; I'm now over 5 years out, and quite healthy, thank you.)

      His answers may not be what you want to hear, but it important that he answer the questions you ask, and not side-track them. If you cannot establish a comfortable foundation within which to work, then look for another onc. You are dealing with your life here.

      We're often too worried about hurting the feelings of drs. That should not be a concern. We hire them to take care of us. They cannot ethically modify their treatments because they don't like us. You need to be comfortable, to know that your dr is listening to you, and hearing your questions and concerns. If that is not the case, please find another dr.

      over 4 years ago
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    User: collinsb01

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    ButterBean shared an experience

    Celebration (Finished treatment): I only had 3 of the 4 treatments my doctor recommended. It was a joint decision between us, since I had no active cancer and since the dehydration was debillitating to the point that I missed a week of work after a treatment. My last treatment was Dec 30, 2011.
    Hair is back ... it came back curly! :) Blood work is good, scans are clean, feeling pretty well.
    I do take some supplements that I didn't use before...turmeric, Vit.D3, fish, flax & borage oil, as well as a couple others that I will begin soon. I've read where these help the immune system fight cancers in various ways. We'll see.

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    ButterBean shared an experience

    Side Effects (Mouth sores): Mouth sores, fatigue, white count dropped... hair loss but it didn't bother me all that much The biggest problem I had was dehydration and low BP...my oncologist couldn't figure out why it affected me that way. Each time was a little worse. With the last treatment I had to have 2 bags of IV fluid... my BP was 70 over 50 when I got to the ER after passing out at home alone.

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    ButterBean shared an experience

    Drug or Chemo Therapy (Chemotherapy): I only had a 2-drug cocktail, as a preventive measure since the surgery got all the cancer. I had cysplantin and taxotere. I had no nausea/vomiting, was a little queasy only once and was told it was because I took the treatment on an empty stomach. I had dreaded the treatments worse than the surgery. I envisioned people laying about the chemo bay, just urping all over the place. But it wasn't like that at all. I was given anti-nausea pills to take at home, starting the day before my treatment. Also, anti-nausea drugs were given in a drip just prior to the chemo.