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    jeankristy wrote on guyster7148's wall

    yes I do know that it is part of the "normal" reaction. I just hate that I cant make it better for her right now. I cant put a bandaid on it I cant have a DR put a cast on it I cant kiss her booboo and as many times before see her smile and continue with what she was doing. im lost, im devastated,im hurting not for me but her. I feel like I failed her.

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    jeankristy wrote on guyster7148's wall

    I cant seem to get passed the anger.. Why ? Why her? she is so young. so innocent. I'm so scared for her. I cant handle seeing her in pain, and all the test and the chemo and spinal taps and she's like a zombie most times due to all the medicine And she doesn't say anything ask anything she just seems to be going thru it. I don't understand any of this. I cry all the time my heart hurts and its not a figure of speech I mean literally, physically hurts.

    2 Comments
    • guyster7148's Avatar
      guyster7148

      I feel your cry for love and hurt, I DO!! You can not control the situation as like we all have with general life, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, ao the TOP great bowl of soup, it is the way that you approach this.... I am not going to say do not get mad and XXX off, because that is how I got, normal reaction.... I get XXX off a LOT and you know what t brings me??? ZILCH..... Work in the program, but, YOUR program, do not let the gentile people work for them, make them work for YOU! YOU have rights and a right to be XXX off, buckle that and get to the TOP of what ever company you are working with, PUSH love, PUSH them until they capitulate to YOUR need! huggles, guyster:)

      almost 6 years ago
    • guyster7148's Avatar
      guyster7148

      By the way, I am 48(49 on the 31 first, EEK) and love helping ANY one that needs love and hope..... Anger is a part of this process, you KNOW that, right?

      almost 6 years ago
  • jeankristy's Avatar

    jeankristy asked a questionLeukemia

    Im Helpless

    16 answers
    • JewelF's Avatar
      JewelF

      I will certainly pray for your daughter. I can't imagine a child going through this.

      almost 6 years ago
    • mamamonte's Avatar
      mamamonte

      Hi..you are not alone, you posted here & that is a great start. You will find support & answers to your questions here. I wish i had found this site earlier in this journey. It is normal to feel helpless at this point, but you will have to be strong & an advocate for your daughter. Learn as much as you can..the leukemia & lymphoma society, along with the american cancer society have been my best sources of information on this journey. The cancer society has a 24 hour phone center, so someone is always there to ask a question or just support you when everything seems overwhelming. Most of all remembrr to take care of yourself..you can't be there for your daughter unless you take care of yourself first. Contact social services at the hospital your dauhhter is at & they will be of great help in this journey. Good luck & you are in my prayers.

      almost 6 years ago
    • Cole's Avatar
      Cole

      Jeankristy - I found out on June 6, 2013 that my two month old had JMML...a different type of leukemia. Three months later I found out I had stage III colon cancer. Sometimes there just are no words to adequately describe the heart break. What I can say though is that love will get you through all of these dark moments. Just love on her, get her the best care possible and avoid the whys. Life is horribly unfair and when it comes to your child, it is so devastating. Get her the BEST DOCTORS YOU CAN FIND and hold onto the hope that it must and will get better. My daughters leukemia is resolving without treatment due to a rare disease but these times are harrowing. I am sure you have such a pit in your stomach and I can't say it ever goes away. I am praying for your daughter and your family. If you ever need a shoulder, look me up.

      almost 5 years ago
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