• Jo96822's Avatar

    Jo96822 started following

    Question: How do you cope

  • Jo96822's Avatar

    Jo96822 shared an experience

    Loss (Lost loved one): my mother's journey ended yesterday. she went into a coma at about 5:40 a.m. and her heart stopped at noon. We were all with her at the end, holding her hand as she took her last breath. after nearly a year and a half of battling AML through a transplant and the multiple chemo treatments, bone marrow biopsies, her body could take no more. I miss her so much and everything reminds me of her. Thank u to all in this community for the information and support

  • Jo96822's Avatar

    Jo96822 asked a questionLeukemia

    psychological effects

    • cam32505's Avatar
      cam32505

      You always hurt the ones you love. Don't take it personally. She needs to get it out, and you're the one who's by her side. Just love her, and vent outside when you need to.

      over 3 years ago
    • Cats4mamac's Avatar
      Cats4mamac

      YlHave you ever just come right out with, 'why are you so angry, with axme? Why do you want to hurt me?' I wouldn't ask her how she can treat you badly when you are by her side & just trying to help her and be there for her & maybe that's the part of the problem. As her child, you will never be able to understand how it feels when the parent/adult becomes the child & vice versa. The feeling of no longer being adequate, strong and in control is such a heartbreaking, desolate feeling. As your mother, if she can no longer play that role in your life, if she can't be the one you count & depend on, then who is she. She hurts, not just physically but emotional. It may be a simple question in her mind, what earthly good can she do for you? It's also possible that she resents you on some level. When a person has been the caretaker in a family and suddenly they need to be taken care of and are no longer as strong as the use to be. Sometimes having to ask your child poo t a loved one for help can be so humiliating and embarrassing. Yes, embarrassing. When my body started to fall apart a fee years ago it was very difficult for me to have to ask for help. I have no children so my sister's kids have kinda always been mine too. When my niece was 18 & ready to start college (which she had to pay for herself), I told her I would help her if she would come live with me & help in the house. She got a part time job for spending /personal money and I paid all the bills & her living expenses. I just wanted her to finish school with a degree & able to stand alone, if need be and able to handle it & provide for herself without having to depend on a man to make it thru life. This was 15 years ago. Today, Samantha is an extremely happily married woman by marrying her best friend. They have two beautiful sons and their first home the have purchased. Samantha also has a Master's Degree in Biology and specializes by working in the pathology lab at one of our local hospital's. Even after she received her Masters she went back to school on a fellowship of sorts to further her education and contribute more at the hospital. This is all what any parent/guardian wants for their kids. I know your mother loves you and it's very obvious you love her very much. It's hard, very hard to understand all that's happening. You know that saying, 'you only hurt the ones you love'? I usr to think it meant it was easier to vent to people you love. I now think it means, we choose to vent our anger, hurt and pain on the ones we love the most & the ones who love us because we know that bond is so strong nothing can break it. I hope you can be patient with your mother and I know it must hurt when she behaves that way and I'm sure she'd give anything if things were different, so try and hold on to that thought. If you love someone you can overlook the snippiness, sarcasm and anger AND completely forgive then and hold no grudges. How can we do this over and over? It's called Love.

      over 3 years ago
    • cjs7159's Avatar
      cjs7159

      It would be normal to lash out at times, but kindly remind her that you are not the enemy, the cancer is. Try to get her to focus her energy into battling the disease, not you. Be patient, loving, & let her know that you are there for her. Hopefully by pointing out how her behavior is making you feel, she will be more congniscent of how she speaks to you & make an effort to change. Good luck, but as someone else has mentioned, do not take it personally.

      over 3 years ago
  • Jo96822's Avatar

    Jo96822 started following

  • Jo96822's Avatar

    Jo96822 started following

  • Jo96822's Avatar

    Jo96822 started following

    Question: Hand trembles?