• JoLoaretti's Avatar

    JoLoaretti shared an experience

    Loss (Lost loved one): My very best friend My husband & my best Teacher peacefully went to sleep one last time, No more battling leukemia, he dozed into his final slumber surrounded by his loving Family, he died with a smile on his Face at home in his bed~!~ grateful for every minute I got to be by his side, and for all the lessons learned along the way~!~ superlove YOU David Laoretti.

  • JoLoaretti's Avatar

    JoLoaretti asked a questionLeukemia

    MY Husband was given weeks to live over 2 months ago, since then we have been doing all sorts of fun stuff, people think he should stay home

    13 answers
    • Laureen's Avatar
      Laureen

      I remember sitting on my couch one nite, shortly after Dx & in the middle of chemo saying, "Ed's gonna be able to say 'we watched a lot of tv together.' Then I asked myself if that's how I want him to remember us. My brain wandered about for a while & said 'Bucket List'. We began a bucket list of our own. Some of the things are too expensive or too far away, but it gets us talking & thinking. I even ordered the vacation pamphlets from some states to prepare itineraries for trips. Also, these booklets make me think about what Long Island has to offer similar to say, Maine or Massachusetts. Hurricane Sandy threw a monkey wrench into my list, but I just moved the things from November 2012 to November 2013......something to look forward to.

      almost 4 years ago
    • Lirasgirl33's Avatar
      Lirasgirl33

      He needs to do what makes him happy. This is what life is about. Of course also taking care of himself but I'm sure he is. :) When I first started treatment, I still made plans on the weekends. To go out with the kids, to have fun, visit places, etc. My dad told me I should stay home and rest, to not overdo it. I know he meant well by telling me that, he was showing concern. I told him that I would be careful and that I would check with my doctor and approve outings. The doc told me as long as you feel good and have the energy go for it! Just make sure to avoid places with too many people if your counts are low. Which I did. I also told my dad that as long as I have the energy, and strength I will continue living life. I will not lie in bed when I know I can get out of it. If the day ever comes when I "have" no other choice but to be in bed, then that's when he'll see me there. :)

      almost 4 years ago
    • JoLoaretti's Avatar
      JoLoaretti

      so grateful to have had so many of you validate how I'm helping him with his wishes, there are no words for how hard a journey this is. to me 1 of the hardest things is not caring for my husband it has been juggling all of the people who would like to input how we should live our life, often those are the people that never show up to help during the hard times. I am so grateful he doesn't want to just sit in bed. The things we have seen since the terminal diagnosis have been amazing The Dream Foundation sent us on a journey to fulfill 1 of David's wishes and we were able to do a road trip up to the ancient redwoods in Humboldt County a few weeks before that we took a trip up to the Sequoias. It was snowing heavily and we had the park all to ourselves if you want to go do something I hope you go do it I hope everybody that loves you helps you do all you want to do life is uncertain for all of us cancer just makes you understand how precious every moment is.

      almost 4 years ago
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  • JoLoaretti's Avatar

    JoLoaretti wrote on BodieHoney's wall

    what a journey, My husby has AML and has had 2 bone marrow biopsy's it is not always fun, but we are able to make the best of our situation, grateful for the team treating him, I hope your jouney is as easy as it can be & you are able to mind your mind... I think really that is the most useful tool, dont allow yourself to play sad movies, somedays it works better tan others

    1 Comment
    • gabriel444's Avatar
      gabriel444

      Hi JoLoaretti,
      I'm new here...fighting for my bro-in-law who is newly diagnosed! He just had a second biopsy as well. Why is that? Did your husbabnd's results change the second time around? Thanks for sharing your story..you are a blessing. xo mary

      about 3 years ago
  • JoLoaretti's Avatar

    JoLoaretti asked a questionLeukemia

    what have people done to help you get through the hardship of living with cancer?

    13 answers
    • still_fighting's Avatar
      still_fighting

      For me I didn't realize how many people helped/help me deal. My boys help me walk sometimes, or carry my purse (at the risk of being made fun of lol) they reach and pick up things I couldn't. My little sister and her family take really good care of us and the help from American
      Cancer Society with rides to and from the cancer center, the Leukemia Society helped financially with reimbursement of some of my travel costs and my doctors and nurses pointed me in the right direction when I needed information or a place to go to ask questions. I have 5 brothers and not all of them 'acknowledge' my leukemia and have pretty much told me that they have a really hard time dealing with it but I can understand and its ok. I'd rather be treated like nothing is wrong than to have them look at me as though I was a leper or something. I go about my life with leukemia in the background but I don't let it rule me. For so long I let it control me and where and how I went about my daily life and I'm sorry I let it take so much of my time. But now that I'm more aware how important just living every day the best that I can is, it brings a certain amount of peace to me. God bless you and everyone in your support group.

      about 4 years ago
    • prettyinpurple's Avatar
      prettyinpurple

      Probably the most helpful through the absolute worst of it, as in the initial chemotherapy treatment and long stay in the hospital, was the prayer support from my friends, family and church family, because when I was too sick or depressed to pray for myself they stepped in and prayed me through it. My church also had a breakfast fundraiser for us to help us with our long-term medical bills, as I was scheduled to have a bone marrow transplant following the initial chemo, which helped tremendously, because I still haven't been able to go back to work. Also during the initial time I was in the hospital it was the meals people made, the gas cards they gave so my husband could drive downtown every day to see me, and the help cleaning the house and taking care of my dog that mean so much to me. After the transplant it was just the continuing prayer support and my friends being willing to drive me downtown for doctor's appointments, and take me out for lunch and spend time with me that made such a difference, because it was still rough for the year following the transplant while being on all the medication, etc. I can't thank God enough for all the people he put in my life to help me through this!

      about 4 years ago
    • Taagbu's Avatar
      Taagbu

      I have a great support group of family, friends and co-workers. Over the summer when I had to have treatment every week my sister-in-law got together a schedule for other to take me. I called them my "Cancierge" (after the Big C show). I was told all I needed to do was kick cancer's butt and they would figure out the rest. It has really help take the burden off my husband, who thinks he has to do Everything for me. I am never without many genuine offers to take me to doctor visits or treatment.
      At work my co-workers have showered me with food and cash to help with gas and parking costs. I couldn't ask for a more supportive group! I am so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life.

      about 4 years ago
  • JoLoaretti's Avatar

    JoLoaretti shared an experience

    Loss (loss of my independence, and my ability to act as if I have it all handled, I needed HELP): do not feel alone, reach out, and some one will catch you, this is a hard battle and You can do it alone but it will be an easier journey if you can share it.
    My husband had NO INSURANCE, we live in California, he ended up on medical,... odd thing is he gets better care on medical that I do on Kaiser, he gets better care on Medical at City of Hope one of the best facilities, and while he is there he often gets better care than people with great insurance plans, cause their plans have to get approved & the state is GOING to keep my honey alive, so tho there will always be some challenges, with or with out insurance there are benefits to both having it it & not having it...always a ying and a yang, always a good side & a bad side....if you feel like your on the bad side just remember all things in life are a cycle & if your in the dark the light is on its way....

    My husband has AML has had 2 bone marrow transplants & the one 160 days ago did not work, I could find all sorts of things to be sad about, I can find a ton to worry about, but it does not change a thing, what I do is start everyday with what I am grateful for, and that makes the hard parts feel a bit easier. just remembering lifes cycles, and that they always do cycle... good bad.happy sad. light dark.high low. ebb flow. youth. age. life death. sickness health, day night. you are not alone, there are so many of of wondering why me....
    I try and look at the lessons Im learning through this and it is amazing the things, actually the gifts I have been given by having cancer in my life, I learned to live in the moment, I have learned there is no time for bull Sh*#... I learned to be grateful for what I do have & that is right NOW, Ive learned to say what I need to when I need to, I learn to let those I love know it & one of the biggest is I have learned to let others HELP ME~!~ I have always loved to help others, but never let anyone help me... I knew how good it felt to help other people , but would never give anyone else that gift of feeling good by taking care of ME, how selfish I was & how great it does feel when some one who does care about me is allowed that privilege of feeling good for being able to care for a friend. that was a great lesson, and you know what you do not feel so alone when you finally admit you want and need help, it will be there~!~