• nmill11's Avatar

    nmill11 wrote on ella73's wall

    Hi ella73-

    Thanks for joining. I have found this site very comforting, knowing that there is more than just "US" going thru what we have. "CANCER- Mommy why did this have to happen to me? Why can't this happen to a bad person? or someone else?"

    There are days when I feel sad, angry, unhappy....whatever you want to call "IT" it. Then there are days when I am on top of the world and can forget that I have this thing going on inside of me.

    I enjoyed reading the following point you wrote, "Decision Point (time to buckel up and stay positive
    and fight)" Yup, it is a Decision Point. Our lives have changed. I at least see the world from a different point
    of view.

    I have noticed how trivial people have made stuff become. I also am still making mistakes when I write my thoughts and still have Italian/Siclian tempermental moments. I balem my mistakes on my ever growing fingernails. I used to bite them to the quick. Sally Hansen Hard as Nails has become a new friend.

    Hey, we're alive and can enjoy all that life has to offer. Stay positive, make a fool of yourself. Wear bright red or what ever unusual color makes you happy. Stand out in a crowd. Proudly tell strangers, " Yup, this is what cancer looks like", when you see them staring at you. Don't forget to take off you cap/hat after your hair has fallen out. Your head get warm/hot too! I take mine off and fan myself with my cap/hat. Be the happiest one in a crowd.

    I was diagnosed in late February of this year with Peritoneal/Ovarian Cancer at Stage 3. I was admitted thru the E.R. after the CAT Scan came back. I thought I was having an attack of Appendicitis.

    When the diagnosis came back, having forgotten what I thought I originally complained about, I told the Doctors, they were wrong and I said "You're wrong. All I came in for was a Face Lift, a Liposuction and a Breast Augmentation."

    I get sad. I get frustrated. Oxycodone has (unfortunately) become by best friend when I have aches and pains. I don't want to become addicted to them. I am very happy to say this is will be my 5th Chemotherapy tomorrow. I am on a 3 week cycle. I live in a neighborhood of Boston, MA and have some of the best doctors and nurses as well as staff around. My hospital is supported by Tufts Medical Center as well as The Dana Farber Cancer Research Institute.

    ella73 write to me and I'll be here to support you through while you are playing this game against a fierce competitior. I'll help you beat this competitor.

    Guess how many fingernail mistakes I made? More than 1 and less than 100!

  • nmill11's Avatar

    nmill11 wrote on jewelRene's wall

    Thank you for following me. I truly wish you all the best. Kick the cancer in it's butt and show it who is stronger! XOXO

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    nmill11 wrote on helpforlaura's wall

    Hi there Help for Laura-

    Scared? In shock? Dumbfounded? I am 62 and found out I had peritneal (Ovarian)Cancer Stage III in late February of 2013. I thought I was having an Appendicitis inflamation.

    I was in the E.R. when I heard this diagnosis. My response was, "All I wanted was a Liposuction, a Breast Augmentation and a Face Lift. What do you mean I have Cancer?"

    So the journey of recovering has begun. You may have another CAT Scan within a few months of being in treatment. This is to update your Oncology team of your progress.

    When I had the follow up CAT Scan, the results came back with a lesion/tumor in my liver at Stage IV. But, I was updated this past Tuesday, during my regular blood work session. I might add, I receive Carboplatin and Taxol every (3) three weeks. During this last Blood work session I was told that the Cancer in the Peritineal section has responded well and they can't find and Cancer.

    Believe me, I was in tears this past Tuesday as the doctors and Social Worker heard my words of despair. I asked if I was Terminal. I asked what type of treatment will I have. I will have at least 6 round of Chemo for this newest Cancer location.

    I can put up a strong front and laugh about "It's just Cancer!". I have even said, "I found a new weight loss diet. It's Cancer". Woo Hoo. Laugh about this stuff. It confuses the strangers you'll meet. Lastly, my Best Friend's son was married on June 14th. I had mentioned that because they may have to entertain the young children attending, I would bring water soluable magic markers to the wedding so the kids could draw on my head. If I did, she said, it would have been a hit. Just imagine the markers running down my perfectly maked up face!!

    I will be here for you as you share this STUFF with us.


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    nmill11 shared an experience

    Side Effects (Pain): Without the 10mG of Oxycodone, I wouldn't be able to relax. Every muscle aches. I do not,however, abuse the doctor's advice. I use this sparingly. I take it to help me get to sleep. Sometimes my hands cramp while I'm trying to get comfy in bed and Oxycodone helps.

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    nmill11 shared an experience

    Side Effects (Hair loss (alopecia)): I love my bald head and do not want a wig. Put on a dose of sunscreen and let me shout out to the world. "YES THIS IS WHAT CANCER LOOKS LIKE!

    1 Comment
    • WendyLew's Avatar

      yes, me too! especially in the high heat we've had where I live! I did miss my eyelashes... as for my missing eyebrows - My normal eyebrow pencil and/or powder eyebrow products did NOT work at all once the hair was gone - even with primer and sealer (as shown in many makeup video tutorals) however my BEST find!!>> MILANI makes a felt-tipped eyebrow pen in 2 shades that works on skin great - lasts until you wash off with soap or cleanser. It does NOT work on hair so well so I have stopped using now that my hair is growing back. It runs about $6 and found at most dept or drug stores. Hope that helps! I also found a $1 eyeliner felt pen at Meijer for a line that makes missing eyelashes less noticible Now that my hair is coming back - the facial hair (chin, cheeks,...) has grown quickest and most irritating - using a facial hair remover (melter) but can't keep up it comes back so fast! and the razor stubble feel on my arms, torso and legs is weird. I rather enjoyed the slick feel when there was no hair - and sure made showering fast!

      about 8 years ago
  • nmill11's Avatar

    nmill11 shared an experience

    Side Effects (Depression/Anxiety): I was at the hospital yesterday, Tuesday, June 25, 2013 and was sobbing about having Cancer. Compared to some of the other things that have happened in my lifetime, "WHY THIS?", "WHY ME?".
    The doctors and Social Worker on my team were able to cheer me up, by letting me know that I have responded very well to the first rounds of Chemo. The Cancer in the Perotineal/ Ovary have all but shrunk.
    I am going to have 6 rounds of Chemo for the Stage 4 liver cancer.
    I also have a 6 yr. old male Tuxedo cat. He has helped me through this process and knows when I need to be brought of my funky stage.

    1 Comment
    • nmill11's Avatar

      I meant to say, My Tuxedo Cat knows what I need when I'm in a funky stage. So much for Chemo brain. You'll never know what you'll get! lol

      about 8 years ago