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    tuckercat2 shared an experience

    Symptoms: I had a my surgery 4 years and 8 mos. ago. I continued hormone therapy up until two months ago.

    I thought I had very little mental side effects from the treatment. I continued to work and still work at the same job.

    I stopped getting raises over 2 years ago and of course, no bonus either. I knew that there had been business problems with some employees who cost more than they brought in.

    I thought that was why I didn't get a raise or bonus.

    I asked my boss if I had been so bad that I didn't deserve any raise at all, and before I finished the question he said yes.

    I was devastated. I had always been an employee that was one of the better ones, had job offers from other bosses who saw my work. To find out that I was one of the below par employees and I didn't even know it. I went home and cried on my husband's shoulder.

    Stopping the pills hasn't helped me regain the ground I had lost. It seems that since I could ask about it my boss could tell me how bad I was and seem to still be almost every day.

    I don't know what would be the best thing for me to do. Try and become what I was or just retire (I am 64 yrs old) or hang out one more year to reach the 65 year mark.

    I am trying so hard! But I can not defend myself against things I did not know about.

    Today it was my boss saying I am afraid to give you the job folders because you keep losing them. I did not know I had lost any! It seems that any mistake I make no matter how small or how often others do the same mistake, mine is the only one noticed. I don't know what to do. The constant remarks about how much worse I am now than before is tearing me up. I can not help what happened. God knows I never wanted cancer! Who would!! I didn't want to have to take hormone killing pills, but I didn't want to have cancer again.

    I thought I was doing good. I feel so, I don't have words to describe how I feel.

    1 Comment
    • beachbum5817's Avatar
      beachbum5817

      @tuckercat2, I am so sorry that you have to deal with this. It would have been nice for someone to let you know that there was a problem when it happened. As you said you can't fix a problem if you aren't aware of it. Maybe someone in HR could be of help to you. Good luck. Take care.

      11 months ago
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    tuckercat2 asked a questionBreast Cancer

    Memory - Forgetting Things

    10 answers
    • GregP_WN's Avatar
      GregP_WN

      I have fought this issue for 29 years. It was mild years ago, and I probably didn't put the blame on chemo brain. But as I get older, the problem is compounded. People say, "how could you forget that"? It's easy, that's how. I don't mean to forget these things, It's not on purpose, it's not because I am thinking about something else, I just plain forget. I have used some plant material in landscaping for 29 years. And today I sit and draw a design and can't remember the name of plants I have been using all that time. I have had to try to adapt. I keep lists of plant names near me, I use my calendar on my phone more, I try to do things that exercise my mind. I hope these things are helping because if they aren't I would be a blithering idiot without them. Hang tough, try to adapt, but if that doesn't work, adapt your life. Maybe you could search around where you live and see if there is an alternate career in the cancer-related field. A lot of companies are looking for people like us that know what it's like to go through it. We are an assett to some, just like others think we are a liability.

      over 1 year ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      TuckerCat2, don't retire yet. I would strongly advise you to call your PCP about getting tested. (Psychologists can do it.) If you have memory problems, there is medicine now to help prevent it getting worse. There's another WhatNext thread where we discussed it, but there are ways to exercise your brain, including dancing.

      After you get information from your PCP, you may feel differently about retiring. Your supervisor could be mistaken about your memory, as sometimes people assume things that are not correct. (Did he/she name specific incidents?)

      If you don't retire, you should get familiar with your government rights under ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act). Although the employer needs to have a certain number of employees for ADA to apply, they may be legally required to provide you with reasonable accommodations, due to your disability (cancer), even including reducing your hours or reassignment to a different position to make it possible for you to work. They are not allowed to make you feel bad about your problem, which is considered harassment. You can read up on ADA at the link below, and/or call the Department or Labor or EEOC 800 number from their website. Cancer is considered a protected disability by ADA. Discrimination due to age is another government policy to get familiar with.

      https://www.eeoc.gov/policy/docs/accommodation.html

      Please update us and let us know what you do. I think if you retire without doing the above, you may regret it. (Additionally if your medical records document memory loss, you might qualify for Social Security Disability.) Best wishes.

      over 1 year ago
    • BarbarainBham's Avatar
      BarbarainBham

      TuckerCat2, here's more ADA info about Cancer in the Workplace. It states that it applies to employers with 15 or more employees.
      https://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/cancer.cfm

      If your are tired and depressed, you might feel better working part-time, which is an example of an Accommodation for you. Wishing you the best.

      over 1 year ago
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