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    Question: Young moms?

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    User: GregP_WN

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    Valgal1119 asked a questionBreast Cancer

    Young moms?

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    • Valgal1119's Avatar
      Valgal1119

      Yes, they are 4 now. They don't know what happened, just that mommy is sick a lot or has ouchies. They have learned compassion early on and are the sweetest caretakers. We're not hiding cancer from them, they just don't understand any of it now. I don't think they know anything different. They didn't care when I was bald, they just loved to rub the fuzz. In some ways I am grateful they've been so young through this. They will not remember most of this and will only know from pictures. I hope it will be better for them.

      over 4 years ago
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      DeeHenn

      Yes being so young will help them not to be afraid and to forget how sick you were. You just keep looking into their sweet eyes and listening to their amazing voices and let that be fuel for your recovery. Even twelve years out, I still worry every now and again. And I have a great deal of complications from the treatments...kidney and liver damage....very weak immune system and a benign tumor on my thyroid....I still get irritated when I get sick more quickly and can't do everything that the family does. But I try to find joy in their laughter and stay amazed at what my kids can do...and my husband is still helping me every day.

      over 4 years ago
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      brcmom

      Sadly, you are far from alone! I was 30 with an 18 month old at the time of my dx . After an easy first pregnancy, my husband and I were excited to try for baby #2. Then came my diagnosis and learning that another pregnancy would not be in my future was almost more difficult to accept than the cancer dx. Growing up as the youngest of 3 sisters, I strongly believe in the positive power of sibling relationships and always planned for 3-4 kids of my own. I remember bringing my son to preschool with my bald head and chemo side effects and it seemed that every mom at drop-off and pick-up had a big pregnant belly. I recall overhearing them commiserate about the trials of pregnancy (as I most certainly had done 2 years prior) and feeling completely disconnected from their "normal" lives. I felt resentful for what i lost and guilty about what I brought to my marriage and motherhood. Cancer forever changed my family and our perspective on life. But not all was for the worst.
      I am nearly 6 years from my diagnosis and about to celebrate my younger son's 3rd birthday. My oldest sister was our surrogate and our savior. (My middle sister tested positive for the BRCA2 gene mutation after my diagnosis and had preventative surgery.) Although the illusion of eternal youth and carefree living was taken from me at a young age, I feel that I am wise beyond my years in many ways. I have also met many other young survivors whose life plans came to a screeching halt with their cancer diagnoses. I encourage you to seek out a local branch of Young Survival Coalition (I have no affiliation with the group) or similar support group to connect with young survivors in your area. Please email with any questions!

      about 4 years ago
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    Just had tissue expanders placed August 23rd. 250ccs filled initially. Got another 100ccs yesterday. This is no fun!

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